 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!5 K& s9 E' o+ x0 m' j, {
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写7 Z6 X# V" X0 y) Y
% r; F% Q4 x/ [6 m. h; H1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
. Y K7 u2 n# U* c9 Y1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it/ n# @" I) q8 f/ N" J4 t+ u u
down.0 P- ^ ~+ v; O" A' t3 Z, }2 O
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
@1 C' t! e3 u) V% `1 a/ Nyou
# T" q! O7 j/ W0 y- r7 @6 `$ h8 eleaving it down.
F2 K9 ^2 _; G v9 K) S1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？/ e" O! w% E; t: B( T% F. }
3 z2 q/ U3 |* I; J8 b; _- }. W1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
3 \' z) W+ K& m; Y nLet it be.
" }0 L7 [2 e8 h2 l: q1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it$ v5 t X/ p* D8 f* }
that way., B* h- @8 n% ]8 p1 H! h6 ^
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.' m+ d$ O! c+ U" W" C
1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.8 }0 [* V4 _+ Z3 u
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
. d, ^3 O, }0 vStrong hints do not work!" k5 M: ^- ]( F; u& G( o
Obvious hints do not work!) g4 f6 e; |6 i
Just say it!- ^9 e/ [9 K( D7 e
1，你想要什么就说
3 ?7 B7 z C! G7 ]1 p我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！; g7 b L0 Q) b
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
6 r$ D) E6 B; s* Z$ K7 xquestion.
- Q$ T* P) _) x/ G9 h3 C1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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, f2 m' F I4 K4 h) l6 U1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
: Q& u) a; J+ H4 }% j3 Cwhat we do.
T# O/ L7 X& T4 `5 p9 LSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5 h( s% i6 m3 o6 \0 h0 R q' C! ?1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。. {; R/ g& h2 f9 j2 g
6 \2 n4 c* @" I4 V1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.( Q" ]( W5 J4 N- U+ _3 q2 r
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument." |4 g+ x% z( x" ]
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
$ u) k$ _! F& Q# G( r: j4 ]我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了. ?/ \9 ?2 C) M
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us$ |, a! v7 r0 J3 s6 F+ e0 O7 G
to act like soap opera guys.
/ y6 G X# q/ x, b9 A1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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; a" \+ G( |) k1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
" B7 {2 W# L* H- y1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways2 c& l% k* F0 @6 S p
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
# v; ?+ f+ e( r0 y; a4 o1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。- C4 S4 i. B0 D+ b
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）9 \; R' r2 e" w" e3 O" ?; p0 t3 }0 A0 [
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it; H4 c2 ~1 u1 s' V$ U! k
done. Not both.
) _4 r) P7 b& h6 C- E9 J k" \! L8 a- K" g/ jIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.9 q& z, l H6 H1 w- V; K
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- C7 M- a1 E q4 K) |
commercials.) M* A/ } q0 `8 ]* f9 a
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.0 n( B. H3 \: `, G4 T
( o4 g6 P: D' S% ?; }- m1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings." d4 a+ M, N! ?8 Z8 n. y, N
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
7 g8 m+ X$ x! v+ ~9 `We have no idea what mauve is.7 Y1 E* J+ V$ T$ y' q
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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8 b6 T- w' p1 y P1 X6 ~+ [6 l' r8 O" f1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
% \& k; ^6 Z9 {, H; p; B; j8 knothing's wrong.
! N' @ a2 X, H' l$ P1 ]+ v/ vWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
" f [, L4 k0 Jyou don't want to hear.: z( r) Y/ Z6 H5 T' f) [4 Q( w
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
+ K- y9 R$ E+ e$ }8 g# o2 {5 dfine...Really.
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6 E4 o w! d7 i8 q( {1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to2 j; B( f: p& w! e
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.& I; W. `5 \* ~+ w" K
$ z- K( ^2 |4 d: W. M1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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# h2 L2 P" G# O; ]1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
& n6 q5 T; w3 D1 D/ ABut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.: `, E/ `6 @2 Z6 {9 z6 x
/ J! j! R3 b* M$ r' ^+ W$ XPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
" F2 d$ d" q. \7 m$ F" P3 IPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
