 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!7 F! s7 _, s9 J; u
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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; u$ u8 P+ B6 c/ _( }: b5 L" r: Z1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.; F5 U2 W8 W# [- q5 D4 G/ n' r
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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x# u# M. V! k8 A8 H/ {" v1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
: g1 L, b' e9 U# u$ bdown.
& y) D4 L% C; |6 }7 V, \" IWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
! b+ A! N8 B& b/ g, {1 \you
% ?; @3 F. s% e" I2 kleaving it down.
5 w- `" Z& x( A1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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/ _* M) \5 i- c3 T( r1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
: L; }$ v: P8 j3 F& i3 Y0 {! p( MLet it be.3 c4 `" V0 @* n7 Z# b: B/ Y
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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( m w+ c) v1 h6 E3 o1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it6 s- e: D& \4 R; J7 N. H
that way. k7 w6 @3 {* r" t. X8 f% ~
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！: ]' a9 W9 |2 `$ D! {/ a) v
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1. Crying is blackmail.3 P2 |- |* z0 T6 Q4 a/ l
1，哭泣是敲诈: L) D' t8 w5 j7 w1 V* W
Z8 [: r5 I! X" D% e: X$ W' ~1 d2 u1. Ask for what you want.
" j: H) J% L. ]7 X7 w" p( GLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
- J' Z* J8 Y! j: lStrong hints do not work!
: p9 @2 ?* I `9 r1 \Obvious hints do not work!
& v4 t$ Y4 V0 ^5 h9 h% S7 jJust say it! ~% F3 Q' J. U( i9 s4 C' t4 y
1，你想要什么就说
2 k! [ w2 r/ B4 y/ u- B. R我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ! j5 v% \& L! _5 b4 ~8 e2 P; K
question.8 ^0 g6 M7 w4 R2 W# h1 T+ E; W
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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: ?& ]5 @6 F, c/ _# \) ]! D1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's5 I: Z2 P8 b0 \7 g7 H* q: } k3 U
what we do.2 Q; q5 f: o. C6 a( `- N4 l
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
3 U3 u; o6 ?' \4 T6 I5 Y+ d1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。' ?6 p1 O+ C$ w. A
1 i& Q# V8 g# u5 @# F# p3 U& E1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
7 o+ Z m& K: ?) f1 z) \" l1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.) p. l" [1 M" e% F5 F9 K: d, C
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
$ R4 k C7 f, a: j5 G L. _我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了& D3 h" p. D' F
# b4 w7 c# R. n3 F; @9 p" Z1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
! ?' O! h& M. ~' B. e' V. b2 s: `to act like soap opera guys.8 U: p3 f3 ^$ l7 f8 R& J
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们/ A) \5 C9 t: v( ], s
4 k+ b d+ |/ `1 U" g. {+ f3 Z1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.8 m6 e0 w F8 M0 ]
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways# |% `: {1 l6 p$ t% H/ V3 d/ Z
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.- ?1 t. z3 ~" \' c. g3 F
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。2 ]2 O3 R$ g; u# g
1 V8 |9 [3 R( a（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）0 Z# u: N! E% r4 T! j: w5 F
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it9 N' U3 M. N4 _' y' O0 g
done. Not both." w M! j2 \ @$ _7 W
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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& t" E# }4 V& `. w' z1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during8 d0 w e. N" N9 _0 \+ h
commercials.- J3 l9 K# I* Y0 v4 R1 S2 p( Y
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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: k/ x. D' Z9 E* i& o/ I1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.& X% }) o5 V) r* _) Q7 C0 X& R
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.# W+ z8 w" l* R; t6 ^
We have no idea what mauve is.3 D* Z/ W) r) ^1 S1 j. j
. |) {8 B5 q7 s& t7 l1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.# n& i9 E3 D, t% n1 u
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like; ~& P& M( ~# d% c
nothing's wrong.
# x0 c# p* j& `# u2 N! eWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.7 c3 S+ R# s9 t* P3 V, T! E# K
2 ^, T1 u8 N2 ~2 V1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
2 S9 n+ J. F) y2 J# c, B3 B/ n$ g: ^you don't want to hear.) x1 k2 b& F ^# i* L9 K) m8 ?
9 e% z0 c( J4 J$ p) [" \1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
# O9 ]; U5 w9 u4 f: v+ gfine...Really.
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. J& s) m' Q- a1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to3 ?) u; s' n5 @+ b
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.1 C0 i- b- b8 A$ e* l0 }/ _6 l
/ b3 J; K0 f7 ?+ j3 T1 I1. You have enough clothes.. E* P. A, j2 b
0 n; c( p9 p' B8 @5 ?" i, A1. You have too many shoes.4 d+ u; N0 v. X) L
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!" g: F1 T- e: R, n" N, v
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1. Thank you for reading this.3 |: i/ m) w% e$ o c, A
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;4 U; g: c. [4 R) N% m1 t* ~) x& S
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.( m! S8 l1 b% `2 q5 A6 H7 e
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
& z1 X8 Q5 i9 B9 g' k/ h5 t+ ~Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
