 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
+ u e0 H( b( j4 ]( ^; B请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写9 p" U2 ]5 h3 \5 l. W7 e1 A' P
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.* w2 o; p9 @9 k
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫! J) v o3 a, i7 z8 F: {
: ] s. S5 r2 }* I1 A" T) k1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it$ z+ `/ F, s2 O
down.
/ X5 O7 b5 R: L( m' WWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
4 b# T$ Z# g o4 [you
; F5 B9 M' w3 L" Y& o8 q4 [0 N. Lleaving it down.
8 U! t$ r8 m" A1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？7 b5 J6 m( F6 L) g7 A
" n" l# N( a4 @2 j, h" O* R7 z1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.3 M" W. P9 X% U, F' J3 r
Let it be.6 f" m4 f J1 I1 d5 t" j4 d
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去; q/ ~# k }8 w' X2 E
& m- h( J# X. j% o1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
, Q Z3 ^8 W+ o( s$ p- B& y" _ Bthat way.6 T) r3 x: V, M" V: h+ I) M" M
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！5 E! g3 m9 U: i. } s; d* N% B
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1. Crying is blackmail.
+ [5 Y( m2 ^4 I* f+ c1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.
2 v: y" k! I# S, A. {5 U# HLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
% B. p) k$ M' G3 |/ c3 m0 M$ `0 JStrong hints do not work!7 T% L4 n: e9 L& }, l) p
Obvious hints do not work!
9 [( {2 \4 y. w+ hJust say it!* D, O: c1 o0 _( [) M2 u
1，你想要什么就说
e' @1 {$ y! |6 \, H; V, d# D! E" x我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！% ~) J9 v; d7 B" V. h0 i: y
6 a, J) B0 B3 N" |7 `7 c) Z( \1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
( f3 ~! `1 g5 }4 k' ]question.* n3 J( I: A1 W, \3 F6 X
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's6 m3 t3 D: [& s$ T$ _, w/ ]
what we do.
z/ a+ Z8 \' J; F U* FSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.. T$ b1 W/ J7 y v/ b4 W
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。) f1 T; v, r& b" ?# T/ p6 {7 P
9 }2 h2 ~7 L: K1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. n2 I C8 ?& w" t9 n0 u' X
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去/ |4 b9 g5 y# r, k1 M6 F
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.: ~' ?7 ?6 J, ^. t: m, k
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.& Y+ t/ N$ R8 |% X n. i9 y: c; C
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了9 H0 G" Q+ z+ S- ~% t% {
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us, D' H2 I; g) J1 a n1 W4 Q {
to act like soap opera guys.9 j5 S. Y ?8 h( H
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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2 Q# Z+ ^" z& @4 v3 B1 q1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.* O4 k& t9 R4 z I2 ]% M, ?
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们% V3 J7 u( ~5 ?4 e
& K+ d4 }3 n8 \$ A1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
8 l1 o& q7 \3 v2 |) Qmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.4 ^2 S7 Z6 A# D! E7 l1 m o- n
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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1 T8 k% n* }; b9 g（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
: V% C) v9 ?) x1 w4 K1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
L/ `3 K s9 e! R) O) w- Z1 a2 w' Cdone. Not both.: S9 s0 R" L5 |' | s
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.# E6 G" R/ ^+ t9 E4 I6 }* r/ J
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during" u: X4 ~0 \ M8 Z4 f
commercials.- {/ I1 a; x- \$ y" y8 ~* _
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.* }; B- J% B2 J& r1 _
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.1 @! f' M! X" s; ^# g2 x2 f( S
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.! n$ _4 h7 k( I: [' E! s
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
, ~1 y' O9 ~' e6 W$ Fnothing's wrong.5 @9 f$ e/ t$ O5 X
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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% N: R8 I% e; o/ ?4 g" z# q: X1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
; H; d0 k! O' b% ?1 Syou don't want to hear.' Q: W! \9 N/ Q% M% p* }# w
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
% f B* y3 P( P5 j4 d5 T8 l; Mfine...Really.3 C# w3 L/ Y3 l
i$ z* |& i! B I* e' `1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
# n3 @4 n* H) ^discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.% r8 i7 t* T) }7 h& C" ]3 t" u
- ^1 O! k3 u& |; V1. You have enough clothes.9 @" k% i0 B$ W6 P* w. z/ ^" ^
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1. You have too many shoes.
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- l9 w3 g8 I( B, {" d# D' M1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.3 h' A: J1 f& v z E% X1 m( o
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
2 {4 @3 h/ J3 M! s JBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.3 b: y }1 M8 W5 u& O
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
' H# B% S* T* z" d. n- t$ p5 c4 bPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
