 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!; D" t" y! F0 r7 w; v& v8 V
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.0 `5 [0 N3 Z9 e3 Z- ]* E
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫# a2 K X. @; X& w- Y, f
. }, z |3 B8 d0 m- B1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it# }+ z6 P9 e/ |- x
down.
3 P; E( s0 I% J, K0 p3 }3 [We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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& v0 G' k! c$ ^! s5 n/ p4 b0 x; ?" ?, }9 ^leaving it down.; Q( x, a8 `) }2 b0 W0 L3 t
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？$ ?8 U/ ^3 k" b& F- ~
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.5 O9 E8 q8 Q( R: x$ ^& I4 Z
Let it be.
% q9 o- G+ G1 L1 U! s2 m& I+ v" c3 l1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去+ w+ a- [4 I$ n
8 q1 S+ Z) @) @$ k, h; c1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
, d: u) R/ E* d6 G' othat way.& G% ?8 Y# {% z, K
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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, r+ M6 d+ A8 J1. Crying is blackmail.; Y- H( m' Y1 t, X9 E
1，哭泣是敲诈( {. C: m4 D6 `8 {" L" w2 V' j
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1. Ask for what you want.
1 c M9 o# Z" Y: q, V" PLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!3 q' x# D. G$ g6 M
Strong hints do not work!3 h" ?- l5 q# P/ [1 i# n% Z
Obvious hints do not work!
( t+ t, \; b, P1 E3 NJust say it!
4 f1 q6 G1 h& j1，你想要什么就说4 C2 K# F9 K& M& t7 K# ^9 ?
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！. A5 D" g( u9 E) A4 ?
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every " w* B* H# {7 E& y# I% A' j
question.# g8 Q4 Y2 K6 h1 }- n& [( ]! [
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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- }% D9 N* w! P1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
x" U. `* A6 D+ @what we do.! _4 V; n5 J: W3 H- N4 n) i! o
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5 j3 P- k$ R5 `* x; {2 |7 j& F1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
/ v2 n% N5 c: V( Y j/ Y1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去( E3 x9 Z) K) Z: C/ J
, @, M3 U! z4 C% x1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.* S; ~+ k( d7 b
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
9 R% O( ?" C# D我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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' ]1 Q* r; S9 p4 Q8 r1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
/ g, O. m/ {: Q) Qto act like soap opera guys.2 W7 B' x- j5 y; T D; Q2 k
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.; m9 _, {( o( B( L3 P
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
& N9 a/ @: K' b% Pmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one., c; z9 k. I2 |% J* h9 c
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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$ B0 v3 y' `$ k3 ]9 Z! V3 F（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）* I- @6 h7 v) `; D; }+ u( x3 I
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
, ^% ]" D! X9 x( J! Ddone. Not both.$ C- `# P2 ^( X6 {2 d* g* f
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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2 N/ J9 J k9 A+ I1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.$ O4 b4 [* s$ l+ N
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.% g+ e+ Y. I8 K8 Q1 x* p& a& i
We have no idea what mauve is.# [; O* ?- j' G# O
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
$ U! z# E9 @' p( Y+ D& onothing's wrong.% [& B5 n, v7 E2 q; f
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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6 G ?1 b U1 i* t3 ~+ L1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
! L4 B5 W4 h5 A j' iyou don't want to hear.$ z0 T z- G# {) K2 c% ?
: _0 r/ V2 E) g4 a. J' c1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
+ q$ R) x% l4 O6 G, P/ Ofine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to/ L8 n" r, [1 y* M0 ]
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.4 ^! o6 ?$ x* e5 O z
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1. You have enough clothes.; H3 t! n5 j) b! J* V+ B3 k
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!7 a4 w* G% Z+ S
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1. Thank you for reading this." R, l7 D( w$ P" k% @% ^% o+ _% R
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;! g+ b5 \) r) [- i ~
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.: f7 D" y6 K: g7 Y1 M/ y
. K1 Q6 H, P( k% W* E N4 wPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
9 ]' D+ x4 c- a' q6 ]Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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