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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.6 V2 {, B% Z" O/ H$ q
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush: v) F2 B0 G8 }- m* Q8 g# r: L
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday- ^: @' Z+ ]9 ~* _
morning.+ L2 E7 h, T! `) f" O
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,% n+ P3 y, c4 c6 Z2 f
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
% |/ N, R( n( Rlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
8 Q# b+ v! E3 G- q% nown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest9 I" H$ ^& z+ y* I3 ?' m P0 C
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires/ P' g y9 i& e
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell( n. m. M8 ~# }- N
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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- r: U/ Z r6 ?5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,- S1 ^; m! x5 P S# K7 e
cussed out, and possibly shot.( F5 j: x% c" V& P, F+ B) D
; C! O5 K) ?% V B( k6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can3 _7 c# \, X3 g6 Z+ M7 ~) c) Z% V
get you shot.& f& m, F* Y$ P+ p8 m) h% S0 g
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that% z6 M; o$ z" d) y* }5 _& T
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
* Q+ L2 z3 h4 A& d; b+ U: _* vthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot/ w' `' h5 S$ S5 F* O
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first/ L% l$ `! B3 Q) g, k
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
; ?1 M; t# I% O3 hbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
% G% h* G. z8 G2 D5 N1 s, k( ?day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
8 S" X: c; k* Q) S7 x) b6 Ymore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
) P5 Y, c/ w# T. v+ d6 V, {deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
. Q, ~4 t& o1 D7 i; [, wsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.. c) s' o5 p+ ?" u* V( ^
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
/ U8 a$ `9 A3 L8 J* vroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
) |$ P& d$ o. _4 a; q) E; v# cRoad are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and" i% u0 P9 H* B
66 Street are also the same road; got it?. p: s$ T! s8 o3 p$ H) d: [ w
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the, e( o2 C% r; Q& M8 L3 g; q3 D
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally; t# j4 @# H/ Z/ W/ s) ]& D
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
, H: }+ C/ D( p$ Eyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off') o8 U0 c$ H. a8 w
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
$ P+ T; ^. Z% J. L) Vlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
0 C% @; `, T; T( B. Q* q6 P5 N8 Zblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
