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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
S3 ?' B5 @: `) ] i! w$ [8 ETiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
4 R: X- v @2 y( m4 vShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,. W H( B; `/ x
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
# G) L4 j* F+ H3 d+ K; y# @8 P1 zHe’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.- h2 a& E2 h, y. D3 n5 Q1 r
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.2 ?4 J* s$ ]% n' ~" ~ u
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
" C* k* b5 m0 C: w$ v# NWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
9 \' S# l! x* `3 g; s+ eFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
" p7 @7 y2 U) ZTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
% s- W% _4 p1 y/ j4 e7 cWith hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
' a E0 Y6 ~# @) J& i4 D- m" ZWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.$ ~# B; ?* v+ v e" f' |" m. n
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
1 \$ J% x. `5 b" HTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .8 C+ ^9 V: m5 `' G& b v
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
" Q$ Y/ b& t, Z& ]' J- c"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."0 C0 {' [) {/ y; ?" m1 _. @
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,/ p! _, ~ L* B& ^' e; r
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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