 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.- v% F4 d( Y. e( B" x" o
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.# o& C# v) o. |% o4 B
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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$ w6 p; C' F5 v/ I- x8 `"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"% K5 Z5 L `5 i% x
$ L. ]- w m* H& ]8 II was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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- |) ?9 ?3 q, l) E3 V% ^And the second one was:7 ?& x8 [/ e7 Y- p1 g }
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". R/ b% J# ?9 s
; d1 G' q1 h; u" y8 v' l/ mI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?; j" b2 d0 m* s$ F
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"1 C) R9 s" L5 v1 v7 o) V
# a' |9 W# I" Q- DI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?& ]( D; T1 O: q3 {( k$ x& S
2 A* j* {) S5 N' B3 T1 y; R" hI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!; u8 R/ ]% X, Q5 D) F. k+ J
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."' H: U0 R! b5 m0 x) w7 s1 c! ~. @ O
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”* A& X/ Y% H: Q) f/ j, M% {$ Y
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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$ a. l# e/ m0 B% [: CThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:" l7 Z1 F/ m$ ^5 ^+ D. X4 j
% [& _, u% d/ f1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.* W+ d* R3 j3 F
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.7 h* W( d. ^# t8 h: a
6 u' N: R3 M( `; WJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".( {4 n6 B1 I* F$ Z% [: h) p
" B" J$ Z2 } J- ~) |0 ERoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
