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Newfie Joke

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鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a+ z2 i' U( z7 A
long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb, ^" ~0 d$ I  I# M
that he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if" V$ @5 Z1 c6 I' U. V' _
the newfie would like to play a fun game. ' C. p4 C( w0 |3 X( O7 J$ f- s, y2 q
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The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so( g$ l8 ?" f6 K6 q: A8 Z
he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The9 Y2 [# j4 V3 u
lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I( s4 K. y; Y1 z! G( t6 O4 e
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,. Q1 d) Q& {' N* F; W
you pay me only $5.
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3 P7 r7 [6 F$ B) R You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I4 J& X7 a) k0 G
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep
/ L9 ]3 {* u5 N, [+ A: mthe lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game.
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/ f7 d" l7 L, s, j: w0 w+ T7 n1 {The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's! l3 R; n  Q; d! b
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' ( E" d1 `/ I& H

7 R; G, l- |+ ^+ x+ NThe newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his! Z( r# {4 f( s* b0 A
pocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the
$ f8 d- ~$ [8 @$ w7 a- Qlawyer.
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Now, it's the newfie's turn.
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) F2 Y$ g0 d2 zHe asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with3 D) `% {2 ]6 x) U8 S- A$ ~, L: F
three legs, and comes down with four?'
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The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all5 U" V' ?2 U, N7 A5 A
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
/ L6 m) d7 m! mthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour
" v4 w' @; z( J6 {* r1 zof searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and+ @9 a( [/ N6 f) y3 x3 V$ ^& g+ u
hands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right7 T) Y6 K9 x" p6 S4 z* a
back to sleep. / k) i1 Z1 c) }: ?0 i5 r+ N- K6 G
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
- p3 v% z! V$ C0 bwakes the newfie up and asks,
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0 v# n/ |9 H6 u8 }$ _8 h: ~'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
1 Y8 x" Q) a- ?( ycomes down with four?'
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1 \+ p! H- b: X7 OThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5$ `+ K5 T* A2 D  }8 Q
and goes back to sleep.
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!( [6 u5 V5 u1 B
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Lawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the  A  `; @6 F$ q* V8 l$ h
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>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two ! t$ v! R& R" w1 N% x
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
' A5 g0 x$ Q5 u  C+ F, q! t7 \>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 2 \( `+ E, y& e  n9 v6 ^$ I
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,   g; q9 A) a' K( G3 M% H1 R* V
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
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>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research ! b( E6 P+ |$ c8 \* v% O
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a
$ Z$ C! `$ U- Y9 R>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more
! S  C8 J7 Q4 H* F/ E7 v6 p>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released,
/ P# u* B% c9 ?$ j  u6 H>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three' T2 {( }/ H1 s8 n3 k

) o: S/ M( r+ y0 I8 C>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 1 y3 m4 _1 N& C( j: g  l$ \
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the % F8 C( b5 E1 M. N
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand
% ]4 k& `# a9 ~1 |1 d% C>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
大型搬家
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表 $ u. w. x2 N) H, i4 q
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
$ \" p" K) c! T% K. D- n3 _long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
4 d' B) `* ]( B" E8 r/ v7 I6 Dthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if6 I4 S' n7 d) ^2 V9 A
the newfie would l ...
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: p8 c' r) L5 @  o# c6 u2 E
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:. p' ^) T3 o$ J0 u+ h" T4 l$ m
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
9 |/ V' h6 q$ x4 u; S4 _5 Z1 K好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
3 y1 C% M$ ?% ~8 y加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

/ D& c/ q' f0 Q/ Q真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 - [( b2 `7 R6 j" x3 P$ n8 d+ `( y' [
2 u3 @5 [" ~7 \

- B# ^8 x# a1 f4 c0 v5 X+ @" A3 c1 I) n8 Y* k& d
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:1 F6 f0 W; i# m0 Z: F" X
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,0 @; ]* M0 T! Z8 t6 \" r  @! ?
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
; }" D0 S5 n/ H9 D* E
真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表 , o# ^* r; w( W0 n) W; m! _
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真聪明,偶像啊
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全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表
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全盘接受一下。

  _; @2 y7 f% U7 d8 U真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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别把我往坏路上领啊。
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你已经在路上了
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表
2 N: J4 {: j) |加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

) S  Z$ ~$ M7 S3 P" @0 F2 P- q; y多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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& e- g) T( \/ b% M' }2 [* M大学教授哦,能不剥削?

9 t9 B7 U! Y3 N她是大学教瘦?& B. r& \- {' E$ i9 l  i% m
大学教胖还差不多
% [, Q2 R. n; E7 Y& j6 v  S6 w' E她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表
) d4 K  c( A1 J$ `/ e% P紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, @9 D* G$ ^/ d& V3 Z% t0 E4 p说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 ) ]' d# D# `5 ^" r6 x, Z; Z* q
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

, v' @$ b$ }* i1 h& B$ C: @
! D/ L0 ]7 }7 v7 J: m7 _哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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