 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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1 B- C; b. f& Z7 r: K7 xTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks., U% k$ q! h3 N, f! f" I
" X# Z' H9 O: o) LWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 1 F: t9 J; m4 a2 l% ~
( M; U+ B" q: N: xIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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* } B' }! {$ u; A, ZLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- ( l: X6 k( A$ X/ n5 Y' i# c, N
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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- U: h" v0 }5 q! EGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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9 f* b- Z" a; UWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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( z, ?7 H- t4 l2 `Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..1 @; K' l5 X* V
1 b$ E! w, J( q; m# sWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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6 f' g9 ^. e$ Q! `$ y0 j/ LWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair. r- K7 S6 w ]' \. a# T
A: m+ _3 o1 S' L" \Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.5 f% u* S: z v9 K+ U& j
2 Z' r- g* U1 r' N, K) o2 I$ zSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.2 G# l; N/ R$ y) w0 q
* o0 \5 b2 g8 g5 b- K$ O1 A$ JSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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. A' ~, v; [. E5 HWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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6 V- q- }3 y- R3 eIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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2 v4 J7 d; T5 P, W. aTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. V, L, }- Z4 U9 R( A7 R: {, t+ t0 h
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Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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0 { J/ I3 p7 Y+ `) ]8 T: a7 _Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. - Q+ R( f0 c5 b2 \
# R! ~; {# R0 ^' V( `# uBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ) u- G1 D/ v# I$ Z0 D8 u* p
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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2 \3 V( q' r' Y ~0 ^Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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6 B* b5 Y: [) S) A$ @! JWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 1 i2 C' j6 p+ P: t* z/ R
8 _0 B- n# k' }6 AWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. " ^# g; X& J6 S
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Rinse off and get out of shower. 7 ]) z" i+ e j& a* V. y* y
8 q5 N2 t7 v7 aPartially dry off.( y( C9 m' x8 e5 g( `, y$ {
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. ; H7 o F& `1 n$ E) y" d
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 0 i% g5 t2 t8 K2 w0 w( w
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Throw wet towel on bed. 1 [/ C' l) \3 u: O& ` I3 [
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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