 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?6 j. y& I) [) a; ^" U9 [( {
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.- N1 m& I( q) _
2. Mostly to clean the house. ! H! z% `0 ?0 ^
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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9 v8 j4 S1 O0 a+ OHow did God make mothers? ( J3 t5 ?5 c5 ?$ l( z
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.- N' G& L' E' j! Y* y
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
) [9 y8 \1 Y5 C3 ~" o3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. , v: G7 K) u, G- R
: e$ `# u+ W8 c" }" [" D! _What ingredients are mothers made of ? 0 K$ @ R. A0 \% f$ I4 H
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
! @/ e2 \; N8 _9 d$ ~' }2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ; C( n$ S; @0 Y* a4 [, [+ Z
1. We're related.
+ n$ p+ Q5 s- A: Z7 f& T2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 2 w) }6 h; A* Q$ W
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
! t2 W$ x, _. M6 a, n1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
0 b- o# x6 \1 |, k2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. & d1 s2 t9 x6 `* I% F
3. They say she used to be nice.
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+ h: u6 G- E4 g+ l8 K+ E$ d. u, E: aWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
8 U9 T" l+ b. n1. His last name.
/ U; ?$ }2 J' Q9 U6 G2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?; r7 @( P% \( q, D0 e( h4 J8 L
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad? & `, A- \8 Y* b7 A5 e
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. P1 L/ T% s5 Y0 Z9 O8 {
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
; t9 V- p; ~$ L S g- ?1 ]2 k3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house?
4 f! _ H- @: @: v1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
9 h' l |0 ^- X/ a) [2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
0 `( k7 A3 k _% L0 j2 l- w F3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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! T7 J! Q5 u9 N7 y( Z. KWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
! o! s5 _0 g4 T+ }1 H( t$ v. S1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
" T! f3 e9 I2 y1 D8 d2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
7 ]( q8 y# l0 _$ c/ g3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 4 F& }% \# q, [ Y
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 2 I9 ] d# T7 L3 d z
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
. X0 f R( C3 U. V- s" g4 w) V1 y1. Mothers don't do spare time.; l; s3 j) g: Y( }
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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( Y. Q k: e0 F. ^0 `) CWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
( `+ E; \ F% M. j3 v6 @4 t1 g( {1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.) z2 {$ x, g+ J
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. ! N/ r3 t( U* r) Y, x
+ R7 p# J' k! s! R/ ?. J& UIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? $ `& h8 t S( d8 c
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. F( q/ E! X' A- R, X5 ~8 h; l
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.$ L( m' R- T9 a: [
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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