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1 [+ x5 Z3 o0 eWhy did God make mothers?8 e9 ~/ n* `. l, u
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
9 ^+ J7 l, U; M1 k& W3 n/ r2. Mostly to clean the house.
9 K- r6 Y; g- d8 z; P3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. # \* s, O, L( Z7 {* y; X2 x" b/ i8 L
, V9 q9 ^( S( FHow did God make mothers? ! G- c4 Z0 ~3 c1 m6 \+ T+ X
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
. Z9 \# s0 U) F, @1 Q5 t7 @2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
4 V) R; d5 z& h4 U) ?3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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- z/ P. G) W/ M: {; MWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? & A3 a; U4 D/ E1 j
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. * \" J+ B; C. s+ E. j& B1 ]7 j
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. % x R3 v9 q! g; \8 W- e
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? ) }1 s! d H! ~4 U( K# l& {
1. We're related.
& z$ S& B# v* s4 y' Y) U+ u8 L2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. ' [ v* }/ P0 I2 _3 L
. T; u4 e/ q" |; w5 mWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
/ v, i9 `3 Z5 Y4 F3 r( a1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. * i/ c# r' h4 j6 c' O% t7 m
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. " X% k: { U* w0 ?
3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? & b* W ?' u, ~5 [1 D: R
1. His last name.5 y, Q) a. @. e9 Q) l' |
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
6 o3 M% D5 t( A! C Q3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 4 P X3 K) y5 k! ^& Z4 M
3 x9 K& B- L- M7 _* NWhy did your mom marry your dad?
* t9 G9 c$ s9 n1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. 7 B4 u, z, U3 @! ^
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 8 k- F5 d6 {7 m+ p2 N
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. + O% q( W' ~% K ~' G. ?
4 O1 ]. j& v' D- y& OWho's the boss at your house? " u8 a$ i4 j; [; b A9 S( b
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ; I1 W* q6 |; S
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
+ n+ a u* e6 [. n- W. p' f3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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What's the difference between moms & dads? * V% J4 j5 P8 T7 y" d' T
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 0 b6 G" S( ~! b* `3 z
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.3 p9 B" E% \) T; _6 u$ D. x3 h) S+ S
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. $ v M8 M' U6 K U( _! y2 H
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. + u/ }8 `5 g. \6 T7 c7 p
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
. d5 M. K% a# d8 B X! r1. Mothers don't do spare time.$ N( ~* b% L+ @7 v* E) p; T
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 7 T r" Y4 m% v0 r0 F) t* n+ r
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
) K: g$ X) S. |1 a( L1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.% X9 m6 L+ m$ Z9 p: g5 _1 f: k
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 8 d5 Q# w* G& C8 g) H2 W r
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. : q! `4 `1 h2 C
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
8 i5 W% \7 I# C8 J: ~3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. 4 |4 t1 e% r' V
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