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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA o3 c& M8 c; X% c1 @: `8 O% m3 x
. z9 Y b" W% Z2 m5 q5 i5 O8 A1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
" |2 g" Y% ^' X! d; p2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
& z8 a; r" K* M" N [* f3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. ) B! i" S: J3 I
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
& T4 R6 y9 A9 ?: {, }5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C. ; J2 J" M/ U6 ] r+ J
2. Ottawa who?
* Z; s; i* \& T) @3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. 5 E; _ Q* Z8 s7 K1 Y
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. * K7 o1 ]- \( z% U, v! n
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. ! b9 B! N1 P& P* k$ f' _" G
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. , o5 ^. n7 U- I2 h6 L9 m6 ~( V
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. h c% k( a- `4 I8 qTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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: @0 [1 y$ l! b1. You never run out of wheat.
U+ ?4 a- d& z2. Your province is really easy to draw.
% @$ _4 [; m) B3 L4 B' ?# T3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. " `; ~5 N5 N# |4 O% a+ M2 Y8 O$ B4 s! |
4. People will assume you live on a farm. t G$ `8 e* w& R2 t2 t
1 @0 Y' ?% r4 k/ b( }TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 4 G! w" z4 S+ _
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
) @! X' {, |7 a* I1 C( W2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. ; \0 q4 o0 f$ q! p
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 6 c2 r# R2 x' u: }& w
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. # Z( s$ d3 d4 c' L
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. 8 l" G, F. L# {3 M" z% z
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO : h1 ~3 b' n- V! a: u$ M
9 k' r9 @( ^7 ~1. You live in the centre of the universe.
) ^# r: F) G% W/ {$ Q. B' F% g2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
( @9 @; }* N, u; Z9 Z3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. ; Y; I3 C" x3 ?, B6 J& P, t1 [$ r6 w
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 3 [7 H7 a$ y, b0 E) n* i
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. ! Q4 Z- D: g# S, p9 O
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
0 N. g& O( X: d( g' B1 s; m4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
- _" Y/ x+ k" X7 q" r2 l9 X' ~TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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+ r7 m% p8 k, N1 g- ^TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK / C+ O8 B: t, ~/ n5 p, {' l
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
) U3 I6 }& {+ ?3 [2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
! ~" S, c2 K; R$ W3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick : \$ C F9 C' J3 q6 b
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA ( u* A, I2 m3 y1 [& r* c3 e; t
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0 s3 ^( |9 U5 ^6 K1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. ! `1 W1 m% ]% R6 m5 r
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
" `- X: ^( {9 `; E3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 8 c5 Q5 w' S* N' ~5 Z
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND : C, U: r' a! Q7 F+ {4 q/ }
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. + s6 N' t4 S, H( ~
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
1 e* I# ?% ~& v* @3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 6 n7 \1 c7 k, F* U8 t2 k7 ^+ V
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
. y6 ?9 F) j( f- a7 B6 }* \5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
/ W$ o Q+ j9 _0 w, s& u1 |9 y' c6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND ( ]: r/ z# S! Z! J7 P1 T: }8 M7 I
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. # K0 f* P" ^/ P5 a0 W j
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. ! j0 f: a3 n# k' p# i
3. The workday is about two hours long.
5 `5 M4 x* Z6 M, W# H- z- @4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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