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In the garden of my heart

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发表于 2006-6-25 01:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!/ ?( J* Z4 V1 {8 O# V# c
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In the garden of my heart& e. p; |6 b6 a, t7 T
You planted a tree
$ T* Y% A8 e; O- t/ @  vFrom sunset til dawn6 T- e" Q  A- b* }" f
Through darkness to light
, ~, n& P+ ~  O% z9 `Nourished with my soul
: }1 k. c5 f0 O" sDevoured my sorrow by thee
1 _1 N9 v0 O6 @5 t1 @
* t- X! P- @7 l% u/ c6 t& ?In the memory of my life3 _5 F+ d( c: C  U2 }  p: t7 A7 E
You planted a dream
; k/ F3 G  g' R3 o& Z6 vShould the sky fall down on me
  k/ B% ~7 J2 \/ T' d9 m$ ~" ^May promises fade in the sea
+ d7 D0 ~) m" k. O, x9 c. |Sewing back every broken pieces
* j7 c* s* j3 y! K  Z" MBursting the love out of me9 n3 k4 ?4 n: _! V# q1 y( ~( M- y

: `) S0 E7 W9 H% }  n[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:08 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
2 c" |4 e% x, y2 r3 I% d9 M1 L听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!# w! R& p: H& j; L9 o& x! B  [
3 n; v; ~9 j) `
In the garden of my heart
4 [9 n$ Y3 H% V, K; mYou planted a tree& O. F/ y1 I7 E
From sunset til dawn: w2 X) F1 B& _- R( ^: q) h8 Z
Through darkness to light
8 b- U/ \0 I* Z2 GNourished with my soul
* o; `$ O& ^" ?- B3 i9 D) ]Devoured my so ...
) W, w$ g% s5 R+ q0 j2 g

: h- F: q2 V, Z4 `" Y' Q, M眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?, c# r  x$ h6 r+ B3 n

, n( X8 e( U1 p0 h0 U9 w( [写得真好。" L& w6 u4 s' X

1 h& n5 }. I% d: m) v+ c加精加精!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:20 | 显示全部楼层
哥们儿,你没喝多吧?没事就过来烧烟啊!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
汗!居然有2单词不认识。:(
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发表于 2006-6-25 03:41 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
' [! @( W; L, S/ [  Q" I. ^眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?& w9 A( m) `9 r0 Q; q
写得真好。/ o- c' P" w3 p4 ]& F  x
加精加精!

' U) s* z8 g! m+ v. {/ M我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗
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发表于 2006-6-25 05:31 | 显示全部楼层
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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发表于 2006-6-29 09:57 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表6 @  K$ m/ y. k; t# M
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

/ z" a) ]# A0 d, _0 l五月JJ这个意境,想想实在是罗曼蒂克,不过在爱屯,海天相接是没有了,只有在湖畔雪山了:)
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发表于 2006-6-29 11:06 | 显示全部楼层
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.( `; l: c- r8 r$ G$ _9 @
2 s+ q+ l; ~! r
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-6-29 18:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
: M2 K6 h/ Z3 |# fShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
4 Y+ D3 q5 T4 p! }3 l# \, [; i. G2 Z9 r* R, v% B/ G& ^
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

. L, k& B8 A# x: }% _- C: c0 J8 p8 e& n- q( Z+ A5 f
Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
( |! B7 G1 N' S. P" q/ j6 i6 r5 k& k' {: N3 N" h
1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".
* {1 s/ \0 u4 ?, _' y2 @' P# Q* D& G) s! t7 z% F
2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.
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发表于 2006-6-30 01:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民,但很喜气!很有乐在其中的意境啊!
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发表于 2006-7-2 10:50 | 显示全部楼层
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
1 l" l1 w' C3 ]  ~  q5 q) Z$ L# z6 P2 W- |
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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发表于 2006-7-2 13:50 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
. A7 C3 R; F1 [" t  c) I0 \- Bthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。- C; k" U+ m/ _1 d. Z0 y

' z! G2 G1 Q) ~: P( vShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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! S. l5 E/ n# I% w& @1 H5 X5 x* U
诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-7-2 13:56 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
) M; W3 i  W$ e. `thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
; R7 o& E5 @8 X5 \" P4 @. e8 k
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
" {! p8 E1 H! x& u- j
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有啊,有很多经典的例子。
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比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
; [$ O" X. d4 H2 Y( s2 }
5 J3 c: K! D! [, i$ v1 l) T" iDon't weep at my grave6 r6 U% ]  J, N( `! i/ P
For I am not there,6 |1 T+ {+ i3 r8 A& X6 D
I've a date with a butterfly5 ]; n, y, g! Z0 M4 L; s6 H! f; F) e
To dance on the air.
1 i$ p! z0 x' A. O. bIf I'm missed, find a flower," Y6 Z# q: P8 b. K) S% `8 v6 P
I'll be there too,3 _+ V6 S* h8 N! M0 K
Sniffing it's fragrance2 D7 `. |2 O- {. I  L! k9 g" @
Right next to you.
+ `" }) R+ e; s, @+ O* m7 w
8 h/ {% `# I* M" X" VDon't be sad$ e. j; E/ t6 x  W0 e1 l
When you remember me,; k' g% X* Q1 Z/ e
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
+ C; N1 D+ K4 T. }6 sWild and free,
. K9 y  d' N1 z0 T/ x+ g$ O/ DFlirting with the lighting,5 B" |# p1 G2 d. g* X& j, a8 a) R
Playing tag with the wind,
6 F& s$ M' Y/ A/ Y* B5 }8 VChasing the thunder
5 M' Z  N  l% r7 p4 i' `+ G1 yTime and again,/ N9 Z5 u; }. x  M; f0 W( S
Soaring with the eagle,
7 n: @: a9 z1 ESwimming in the sea,9 q8 U! R9 D3 w' O
Enjoying all of nature
+ V* E1 S' V8 jWhile I'm waiting for thee.
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