 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
2 p" p" p. h1 P& E S# n$ W请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写' Q0 |: `, U- U
- T, M4 r) h$ }; j B: `3 v3 L1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
, W, Q. T9 n+ j, K" J1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫, s7 m4 G- R& u# g2 s/ f
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
( R; s1 T2 \3 w& n- s" h5 {+ {down.
3 G) z* F2 C1 H: u" Q- A; NWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 4 c# W& O4 i+ o
you" ?6 h# Z+ Y! W2 D. e" o
leaving it down.
) M4 G& i/ C1 a# \1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？% c% H; m' S0 `- C: `
- h t1 z n5 `7 P2 e1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
$ ~1 l. o9 q. k# VLet it be.8 O4 n! z) s' C0 w- ^6 X
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去- Y& @' g# [& t) i) |/ Z2 m
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it' p2 `5 T7 \' U% w! z# e
that way.4 i) N8 H5 D2 ^+ Q+ u* q
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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. a3 Z. h+ w- R% |4 T6 L1. Crying is blackmail.
' a" @7 p, V- Q) y+ ]: z3 k+ D1，哭泣是敲诈! K: O7 ~9 b6 v9 p
* a- V0 W, ~4 @7 a6 L4 @+ A1. Ask for what you want.
4 q' U' ]% R" T, W: ^' [8 \Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!+ {* W$ j& S; k: s
Strong hints do not work!! O" p m/ s: U" \
Obvious hints do not work!; [) N: ^/ T) h
Just say it!
& S. z$ \4 S: ^6 {# [1，你想要什么就说
8 u1 \5 [$ {8 y5 u+ S" p我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every & g- E9 s! J# r% m. c" t- \: ?
question.
& P& z; z1 J8 W( Y+ e* p/ r) J1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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& z7 {6 C: N! U+ C1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's" d, G' U/ ~: a) n6 G8 Y9 A
what we do.' b$ ?- Y% q- \& D2 L
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
- d" ^$ r2 n* H$ H1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor. V" ~9 h5 a. i: `: m% M
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去) p1 o7 C1 n- c) E
7 ~/ b) m. t6 G1 l0 F3 R1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
7 b$ f5 `1 V8 R: j) I+ Q9 oIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.: p( z5 W" T4 u
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
. R) M- }" |2 x& F1 `# Jto act like soap opera guys.
: q9 r A$ T0 G5 r( f; k1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们3 z8 U" S% c- c& ~/ s+ j5 v
S2 X, c4 V( n2 C1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us., O3 Y4 t3 T, G; V' z2 ]) e
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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* N5 V2 g H$ S1 ^+ w2 L4 K; x4 O4 c1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
$ O$ p- f4 y: t; Tmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
( a8 A4 i8 V& a% s4 `# n1 F1 U1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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1 _4 d2 F* e5 U: }1 M! d0 ~（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
. X! n+ B# t+ N6 A4 P& n0 J- c1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it) i: v6 A; l1 y) [; n0 t8 |
done. Not both.
$ Q; v% {" \0 }- \If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during6 w7 F7 Y: v: B' f$ A, Y6 t- s
commercials.. Y; y+ W- k c! k- ]) x. U
5 z4 _+ V5 P* ? l3 w% Y1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.0 \7 S/ O7 W9 f/ D% h6 Q
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.1 s1 B4 u( Y0 R+ ^- \. w
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
4 Y* s o% D+ D$ ~We have no idea what mauve is.* W5 L1 v/ F8 g7 x4 r
3 G& Y& p* M r3 v W T2 c1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
% r$ e U& m+ S2 Y9 {) |/ Pnothing's wrong.
" Q, z9 Y4 ?: B& U6 w( v- r& [We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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8 c; }; H- a9 D1 k' n5 b1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
% P; {/ C" i4 G% n$ q7 ]you don't want to hear.
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% X( N2 J* G I6 J& c$ C" S1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
3 p; D* X; n7 ]4 @fine...Really.1 G1 r9 E) x4 }( Z
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
$ `$ R- x3 a" |! X& Ydiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.& U! F& |- D+ W; h5 d$ ~
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1. You have enough clothes.( X" }2 Z; V9 c4 q# Q4 E+ u4 x2 n
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1. You have too many shoes.- a, X* T+ |) N5 |% ^) n+ D5 i
( K' c$ J5 ~' u1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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' ?. W. w9 l3 D% R1 k2 P1. Thank you for reading this.
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# m6 ]/ k8 F. CYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
/ F+ I# s) b) ^7 u& k0 x' [But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.4 }- K" C5 j! G, k+ a& }
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
6 @0 g- ?$ ?, b& PPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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