 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
0 w1 J, ]% I1 }" p8 l6 e请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写5 U$ @% P! y5 p. Z7 j3 A H1 y q
1 n. F) g7 N4 J7 ~) f7 ^
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
3 A) A: X! u9 b4 j* b6 q1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫2 l! d4 Y/ H, H5 d# c' _: I$ N C
: ^5 y; E6 a4 e+ _% z) k8 x% H
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
; y V7 z, C# }4 O* Sdown.4 q! W" d' m5 n1 C& U F
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about & t4 x$ X0 `. [- q7 Q; B
you4 _4 b, |! h3 b! M% b, J/ F
leaving it down.
+ f; _- y8 l! N% }; q' u) _1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？5 T" a$ n1 ^, m# ^7 j
+ N7 w: p7 B# |0 u1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
6 _' i0 S, p9 o8 X3 K8 V+ p3 I+ CLet it be.
* u; R" w& Y2 n1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
* o. G9 j. c s/ ]* t% H0 M, f$ `+ J, m S/ M* \
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
$ P$ T& n* z* |8 f+ o; t: Cthat way.
) E! M: v; D. L; Z" K: L% ]( H1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
& }6 E: ?6 s% W9 _3 W. Z, @$ m" V: Y; ?; k; N
1. Crying is blackmail.
7 g/ X" I( g" t; ]' v1，哭泣是敲诈
/ n! V( D* a S# I/ \% n" b9 g a% R- U9 n+ Y9 U3 _1 {
1. Ask for what you want.- Z: @; M. e/ |5 B5 U
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
w1 j0 t( S6 l! J8 o2 mStrong hints do not work!" ?( ~7 s0 j% [1 U7 t# x
Obvious hints do not work!
# r5 I3 N) |9 Q$ P, s. bJust say it!6 x* |$ l- m3 X7 ?) v& ]8 k8 w; X' B* _
1，你想要什么就说
) x; H; |- y+ N) \我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
3 [; f$ [ J3 v6 _' J& B+ X; p5 `, }. w. f( W6 a
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
4 e1 ]- c4 @" Y! iquestion.2 [; T2 c! @/ m+ X% n' H, c
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）0 M n; H! K I4 l t3 r$ M
- F- h( u- K! k8 W1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
. h6 T0 r2 N: a/ X4 m2 uwhat we do.
# t% h3 s. A1 lSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.3 d& B1 _+ Y* V2 t
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
$ S4 r; m, K1 d0 f* |7 a: L$ L0 v! |0 x9 K2 v# G/ |' w* B
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.3 }2 t9 j5 s' H- I& p
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
2 h; f9 ~8 Y2 b/ ]9 M: \3 V6 s, V! Z* @2 P1 P: X6 [
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
" K( F1 I, A) P- u- bIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.- h4 o. }6 k0 j" |( J4 S
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
8 p# l6 F& {- S$ N$ X6 a3 w% W; c0 g- e( K/ W* v/ h# B r k
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
+ n* I9 R; F( K" z) q$ nto act like soap opera guys.: X& c& O3 d }6 T. }
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
7 P% U- W6 P. p9 {% h' K9 ?- G7 B) F1 [6 `( H9 n
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us., @! [$ k% Y- j6 d1 h
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们3 B8 s. [( r* r h) j
. L6 \/ o$ ?. v9 C, V) c* C1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
' z5 ^7 T. W* \8 F) R- U+ @8 w9 y" Nmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
* S+ K6 p; P; F" k3 [5 n" B) j8 f! M1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。$ ?+ _1 o0 {' J% `6 }
+ g4 t+ Y) N$ y+ e" L% o" n0 D（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）9 V2 y1 }8 x8 U" _
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
, o* `8 e: ]2 Y, j L7 Udone. Not both.
2 z, M+ L% Z: P+ u1 b, D6 vIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
& J3 u! a# y1 S# H6 y# W" S g
3 D- d1 Z8 ~3 S0 `0 m1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
! T, u Q }1 k6 ]- icommercials.2 g3 u* Z' J, G/ ?
( N( u F c1 ?$ c! a H: ]$ ?1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.$ r8 T6 C# _6 g, {
9 g1 i" V2 c6 ~0 \* u1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings." B: b0 v' c6 N0 _ R
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
0 Y ^: k; t8 m: {% B; bWe have no idea what mauve is.1 |8 S, H. K4 |) _) L$ Y: q
' Q4 @& F& Q2 H/ Z1 A- a1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.* `0 l, {+ V; N5 W0 _/ A6 |
2 p1 z1 B( f0 v+ v$ p: W1 s
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like! y6 }0 m( p4 i% e1 _8 Z
nothing's wrong.
k1 g- T1 r7 c/ EWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
, T1 W+ C; T5 K( Z/ e) X
" r% q- d0 b6 Z s7 G0 R) N. j3 p' }! Z1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
4 i. U9 g- y. `' `* C1 U$ zyou don't want to hear.* ?6 f/ P% f9 F9 \* {* D; S
2 C: k8 D& A0 K4 g5 k- d1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is6 F3 \+ S, _/ ^ i) y
fine...Really.; S0 B# f# p% S3 G$ \
, V J! g% ~) X
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
" P" K' S, `* sdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.+ C* u3 P9 ?; ~; F/ ^; Q
$ z) }/ j( k; b8 u1. You have enough clothes.1 G2 N$ K6 k7 |& }% G y, W0 @- C
) e: F b: |. m! H4 y- p% O
1. You have too many shoes./ B2 m5 t% l, g8 D* e# q
6 c) y: ?/ W# Z4 }1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!9 [% }* M v) `
2 S! }6 w1 X, ^& R. }1 ]6 \1. Thank you for reading this.3 ~" x9 ^9 a2 Y. L
' d2 \+ G5 }5 \/ F; F/ ?Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
+ k4 z& I" D% xBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
X! `& @7 [5 Q6 s' W# l- q' e5 |" r1 v, z& w E
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.0 }7 O. I2 N% X) o1 P
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
3 E4 x4 ] { a; i6 g- Q. U