 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
w8 V3 F* G8 V( p& _0 w2 X; x请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写$ g0 L% }0 I2 T6 F
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.& b5 o& |$ o# T% O! w; `$ y! U
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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8 @' _: S2 K, _2 D0 X1 q4 K1 J( j0 ]1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it8 `+ ^) i, j" @' I- X4 i
down.
$ s, w F& s# A, iWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
$ p) F. d: _1 V4 yyou$ ^/ b" T/ \) r" F4 `) P$ H
leaving it down.
+ U, r: l; X6 P6 I7 z* l1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？" N2 r0 Z( e, g, J/ Z0 }
- g( A" v- {- w7 b1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.) k$ A' e; H$ h7 r
Let it be.
1 e: d. A+ O' N9 z; U1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去- H& y8 L6 ]3 y7 D5 J! b
1 z9 Q; s3 I# \1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it$ n. {8 ` z- E$ h5 q
that way.
0 c. l P( V* K4 J1 E1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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6 @6 [6 K8 A$ t; p6 p1. Crying is blackmail.( B* g) r; E- V2 K
1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.% o$ C% R0 y5 G6 U W- J
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
3 I$ N# a% X, U/ OStrong hints do not work!
8 C+ m7 g$ b6 r* j( }Obvious hints do not work!
! }/ M2 _+ G+ mJust say it!0 w1 W5 {/ L, |7 |) g6 n& E
1，你想要什么就说
% p6 Z9 G# i: V8 v我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！$ B5 X" F6 u4 `4 `% M# i
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
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1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）) o% ?* v& W, X. ~% k4 T
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's" u6 N1 p1 l/ O5 ^1 `# s8 i, h
what we do.
% L6 X2 a# I2 c, ^7 ~! ZSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.2 L7 P" D: D' A* H, P
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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/ ?1 T! s1 g! G* ]& b1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
# ~ S$ G5 ]) q. Q1 E1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去0 _0 B& b4 o1 @! y7 ~! e
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
# p- P" g% n" q! ]3 y% V" ?In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
0 ?! {7 S+ d2 n4 F3 b- M {我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
' O( J0 g. S4 j6 \0 g1 ]! s9 ~% yto act like soap opera guys.
8 }, c( C& ^1 d: T1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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6 ]0 f' C: \( ~) a( z- V7 r1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 Q. Z9 D, H0 x' g1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们+ J1 w" e4 y0 w" g2 r+ Y$ I9 s
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways1 H& H5 p9 O/ w* b1 o8 o
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
8 \% s# x P; [1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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# M( E- l# ]3 R8 D（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
4 j/ D% t: `2 c, ]9 G: k1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it: ^7 _1 s! q: ^$ `% O' O: e
done. Not both.
& O/ h! [) d- q6 B% M; l2 lIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during' [3 J* Z5 W7 e5 S3 B9 P( E
commercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.9 g8 W6 w; q0 X
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.# M4 d, o! s* i3 n$ b! E
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
! K7 O+ P+ P) FWe have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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: g2 Z/ x; {$ m" s4 C1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like* k* q. E E7 U1 T/ [# c: j3 I
nothing's wrong.1 N r |6 R2 H& b& X
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.4 q* Y4 l# Q( U* l# m; K3 `
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer# Y2 \2 H0 F) n9 m+ l
you don't want to hear.8 ~* v e7 Y2 ^2 O: N) X
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
: h+ k: `) C I+ ]2 f' E/ s' vfine...Really.- Y9 o O3 C9 B B. L
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
3 z- ]+ K- {/ y& r+ wdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.9 g* F' m$ G% g# f( b9 |
H0 L* p/ s7 i( ]1 n1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!5 x* b+ X& e S/ l5 |( [+ M
+ ?" v3 p: Z0 l; ^1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
; R( Q- J$ R# T! }But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.. ~. Y; V. C/ _5 ?' }9 t$ K
* G! W/ u' I/ T) A! q2 l# x% f# O1 ]Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
* h# O1 q/ W! a/ t/ NPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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