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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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# u( E( K4 Y/ @+ [1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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. ? K1 k& M" X" G4 Y3 s2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
# L; a: j: k* ?hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
0 ^ N; u; F1 Q6 X) t2 R2 {- t9 k4 e2 Cmorning.
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- _% }1 L- y ~+ u4 }: D3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,/ V t/ `! ^( ^$ X4 [. U. M: i
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
8 Q' v0 B( H8 c' A" [ k: mlanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'. {8 {$ n7 R l5 u& r5 o
6 K7 X6 m) E n0 R4 z4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its. Q9 f7 i6 V# H
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
% S$ @" \6 a; n5 O0 z( ]muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires, Z, s5 ^' n7 n) b' T
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
@7 t/ J0 Z7 J7 C/ Yphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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. H, n% `+ y L' ^/ N, k5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,% ?9 G1 e3 z* z
cussed out, and possibly shot.. x6 @ H( f! T0 R9 m
. O: X# [8 s4 a+ e L& P6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
; d4 g) ?9 F+ R( n, kget you shot.* \5 C. i8 K o+ d6 J" O
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that: C4 |3 i8 v: s' Y
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at! B y1 O6 k2 j' l7 I: w8 |4 I% {
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
C# S6 d1 P8 X+ Z$ _# F. B% J& Gyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
* ^+ c R% |# C# [vehicle through the intersection.1 m2 f+ M' f$ P! w0 a8 H
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
! \% j# E2 a8 y- ?) C& gbarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
. }( s# N" T4 x) |& I: P+ }day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and2 g: x, d ~, F8 a
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
" K' D- ^0 S' ?0 o+ B4 ^$ Rdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,0 x# e8 o+ r$ y
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same) c" w: @7 N- [$ [" ?- ], \9 [( E
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye" A' y' O$ |* w$ {7 A
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
; I# E1 n' k' H d66 Street are also the same road; got it?9 J$ ]' N( }7 R- w, T
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
2 p/ Q) ]6 j8 o) Zshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,! s! i( o% _8 U, G' z9 O+ Q7 `- @
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
- ^ g, u0 A7 maccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.1 S5 {0 r2 I2 g7 S
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
" V# ~* l5 { y2 Tlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
: y- q# g/ a. p7 Mblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
