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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?) r& R3 i* L% B. w: z0 b+ f
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Let's face it
+ t. m3 c( e" t9 v4 P: u3 bEnglish is a stupid language.
* f4 w6 j4 n( r+ o8 t5 c- [6 hThere is no egg in the eggplant
0 g* a8 D- l O. u- ~/ F8 yNo ham in the hamburger' u, [7 z% N, K- ?# L
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.- p$ }7 x2 c. h9 W
English muffins were not invented in England
# g. C) B/ |9 hFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted$ u! p7 j5 r: d& |
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that% T* t A: V# h& k5 l& g. m, j$ P
Quicksand takes you down slowly
; M- c; A, N) ^8 z6 jBoxing rings are square
" g2 `2 L& t' o3 a+ A/ AAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.: c' A; `" U$ Y1 j1 o
If the plural of tooth is teeth
$ ]8 ?) W4 J3 p% z( uShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
- z6 v) t7 v+ `5 Z- gIf the teacher taught,
5 @- K x G o) kWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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% ?3 O" \0 M- N+ r. L' _If a vegetarian eats vegetables
: }2 t& n+ c3 e7 C& l% s0 yWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
6 z0 v j' O7 p2 SWhy do people recite at a play- R& C+ v V: b. Q" V! ]! l! D
Yet play at a recital?; A. y& }+ x/ [! s
Park on driveways and
; @ n5 u4 h" z# j" A4 L6 R8 JDrive on parkways. ~. C. z9 ?2 ^" p
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy8 p, ]2 r/ ?& {+ Q5 n! ?' _& N
Of a language where a house can burn up as
1 |' }' x. e5 s PIt burns down
, `2 T- o0 Y) m% m. ^) c; ~1 \2 FAnd in which you fill in a form 1 O$ t6 w* v! E) `9 [8 G
By filling it out
& S9 I$ K) d) q; ~$ m, vAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!8 D# r, k# f5 |/ ~/ ?9 q! ?
p, h1 r" G; ^English was invented by people, not computers: V4 ]- @3 x' K6 x% }$ D/ b# [
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
7 a+ S) s) ~+ Z$ N(Which of course isn't a race at all)0 h9 _- n1 Y2 |$ Z* W
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That is why/ ~* d7 u$ }3 v; B2 H& j
When the stars are out they are visible
+ |2 Z3 h; a. d' I9 Y. E- ZBut when the lights are out they are invisible
- v! a' P6 s& u+ Z; y* ]And why it is that when I wind up my watch' A+ x+ o+ }9 c" y1 p9 O9 v
It starts) a! N$ T0 J$ {4 C7 x8 ~" o
But when I wind up this observation,
9 ~5 ^8 F$ ~) H+ I* V: E# T; bIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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