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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?' p1 u8 N, p7 Q5 w. ?( _% Q
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Let's face it
0 [0 u7 ]- l' c) j# ?/ X8 jEnglish is a stupid language.
% q- f7 S$ K) J# V( x6 nThere is no egg in the eggplant
* O- t8 ^/ k+ v2 |4 O5 n D' uNo ham in the hamburger3 i# U$ t# @6 S* t3 G
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.7 R! Y9 l4 Z) L% }- p0 s9 R
English muffins were not invented in England" b% ^4 w2 Y. u# R$ R. H
French fries were not invented in France.
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. K9 W! x% l1 q/ f. IWe sometimes take English for granted
4 a# E; ^4 O& Y7 P% iBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
/ ]# Y5 L8 z9 `Quicksand takes you down slowly$ i1 B; l7 ~; [1 t s9 n
Boxing rings are square
0 }( w! k) b8 h5 s* }And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ( _- C& d$ c& k h6 p2 [
( M" S; ]0 ` O; x( TIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.0 q+ M7 ^" j) o6 F6 C$ u* ^
If the plural of tooth is teeth4 r, Q; t7 s9 y3 U
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth) G; r, L! t) c0 u7 [8 I
If the teacher taught,6 b* B# V: S( H3 ]
Why didn't the preacher praught.' x7 c7 i- b! S/ e, R8 h
+ ]4 j* l) D) E: Z2 AIf a vegetarian eats vegetables h% X9 |' t1 B& {& {* E) j
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
, O9 {+ Y$ R; Q: L( G3 m$ n. H! oWhy do people recite at a play7 |" C8 E& R; J
Yet play at a recital?
1 K% K# p& B3 U) ~* |Park on driveways and
3 h' }! W# P) `3 y9 n9 ^Drive on parkways" I# f' n8 x2 X L9 h- F1 ~
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy, H% l5 t- v& g
Of a language where a house can burn up as2 B6 I' B4 R- A$ W. G
It burns down) ^! `$ W1 {. I. m
And in which you fill in a form
& J: z2 F2 U, a; ~( p" x! \' D: VBy filling it out
" J# p% ^- T+ Y! m4 e, jAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!6 {, e9 Z$ u9 E' \0 k; q: u
& r1 e3 ?9 ~( Y2 ZEnglish was invented by people, not computers9 j* B7 Q4 a; ^" M4 X, C
And it reflects the creativity of the human race# ]0 }# Q+ D7 r1 q0 u+ A
(Which of course isn't a race at all)1 c6 p* i! A8 b, h4 u t
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That is why
# S' p% F: d8 R& Y8 c9 \; ZWhen the stars are out they are visible8 ]& Y# G7 k" ]8 S6 D$ F* n
But when the lights are out they are invisible+ L+ u! E9 T" P( l! Y+ f Q
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
1 X6 t. I4 J9 kIt starts
, |; S3 S5 Q0 n: T% t8 c, qBut when I wind up this observation,
3 v, l4 X' }3 U) V: w' P6 N3 XIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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