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Newfie Joke

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发表于 2008-10-31 10:58 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
A lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
7 W+ J+ K3 b, y; }' R# E: U5 K' {long flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
6 z5 z2 o! L# E' f# jthat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if: a7 g. z- |' f9 I/ g
the newfie would like to play a fun game. $ D; _4 u, [- P9 L
  
- p; J- N. e) Q& A8 W' y' R3 h The newfie is tired and just wants to take a nap, so
/ y9 f  ~+ {9 @3 | he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The
5 B' y  r" V, V& q% H3 ]* s+ D lawyer persists, and says that the game is a lot of fun. I( w, G/ J( p7 A8 E! ?
ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer,* H# b; t% X" Y8 a
you pay me only $5. - A7 ]% N1 ?. C" {

; q! w' Y8 D0 ]$ l You ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I3 E( H2 J- A, i
will pay you $500.
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This catches the newfie's attention and to keep/ c; e- e  W3 @: B
the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. : F# e) l. p- h& p; Y
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The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's1 Q4 l4 A* K2 s5 d0 [7 ?$ R4 H1 |
the distance from The Earth to the Moon?' 7 s- I) Z5 S6 E' Q  e- n" \3 g
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The newfie doesn't say a word, reaches in his
: j3 ^; h# s  o9 `2 h8 t3 rpocket pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the0 e7 |$ b# }  X# P
lawyer. 5 [; n7 z% T* \" f+ r

% t4 Z: p: P/ q" J, Y9 ?8 j7 ?$ F2 NNow, it's the newfie's turn.+ c2 U3 q& W' d/ k/ _/ M& I
6 e2 h( d1 C- u! e! {
He asks the lawyer, 'What goes up a hill with
0 C/ z7 z. J% Z; H: K% dthree legs, and comes down with four?' ' X' i6 a! C4 e( e' \% d
7 R4 B5 Y  U/ g7 i1 s% W
The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all0 k9 Q8 Q( a& `1 n9 T- t' l# }/ l
references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all
; M) g- p7 p1 B" X0 g5 }2 ]$ Pthe smart friends he knows, all to no avail. After one hour$ ~# r! M& Z  d9 }& K) v5 T
of searching he finally gives up. He wakes up the newfie and
/ F2 ?+ Y3 e+ l6 vhands him $500. The newfie pockets the $500 and goes right
/ m1 \& {9 E" H7 s9 ^$ L' eback to sleep.
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The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He
' a; F: Y) A6 J  c$ b! n8 Z* z, Cwakes the newfie up and asks, 7 Y- d8 K3 }* }

$ j, C+ x7 d7 T! X/ N1 _. ~'Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and
( h5 C6 D4 Y8 x, Z3 Z& Ocomes down with four?'
1 V: a4 r8 S, Z
) d' u4 o9 V0 z0 s$ BThe newfie reaches in his pocket, hands the lawyer $5
: B8 ^7 u9 H$ D2 R3 W$ Aand goes back to sleep.$ h* S$ N  m( H9 c
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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-10-31 13:41 | 显示全部楼层
So funny!9 f3 E. I2 n. c2 z: q& `2 [+ ]$ \# K

1 I3 |* a: c! v% [5 hLawyers are not that smart as we suppose, eh?
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-10-31 20:17 | 显示全部楼层
so nice
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发表于 2008-11-2 08:50 | 显示全部楼层

Penis Study

老杨团队 追求完美
>>  Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the
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7 @5 J# [7 |: T7 X" w4 Z, o>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two % r& L, B. R8 c
>>years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason
9 o  Z" z7 m; s" B+ A! }1 n! H' J. K$ G>>the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the 6 M4 A3 R* u4 E
>>man with more pleasure during sex. After the results were published,   }- n% ^$ ~4 j- Y5 T6 \+ |
>>the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct
- a" k3 d- Q4 ~: Y, H
5 T9 x( ~/ X! k>>their own study of the same subject.  After three years of research 9 Z, m0 v9 j/ G" w( W" B' A2 @
>>and a cost in excess of $250,000, they concluded that the head of a ' A! H7 l( t! q) w* M1 \; t
>>man's penis is larger than the shaft to provide the woman with more 6 |- q; g* Z7 y: n; o5 T
>>sexual pleasure. When the results of the French study were released, 3 O5 \! x' U5 |
>>Newfoundland decided  to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three
  d- w: k+ c7 i9 ~, c- f+ J% P9 [) Y; N: C" j7 g# g+ i+ Z
>>weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Newfie's 7 Z0 R8 A; `6 K+ c
>>study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the 8 h5 W) g+ Y* G' ], ?
>>head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand % k& s9 m% V, s. N
>>from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
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发表于 2008-11-13 15:32 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-13 16:33 | 显示全部楼层
Great
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发表于 2008-11-17 21:36 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
newfie是什么意思?小声的问一句。
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:33 | 显示全部楼层
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 07:38 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 秋染红叶 于 2008-10-31 10:58 发表
6 u, {& d: n/ ZA lawyer and a Newfie are sitting next to each other on a
4 `& O5 {  }% b, m: flong flight. The lawyer is thinking that newfies are so dumb
$ @' Z9 M3 S8 `# athat he could get over on them easy...So the lawyer asks if
& `" f- X. D7 |the newfie would l ...

8 h" W" i7 J( W
& v2 m" _0 X9 H! j' R+ z# |8 G7 w/ ?  y6 b, X9 ^
好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:
# x% i, K' D) _, A6 M1 k  p“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,
- P0 L' }+ l  E9 @# }6 P- X8 ?& W9 W好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 3 a1 P' `2 V/ q' H! C' @0 E2 p
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.
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真博学,偶像啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 08:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:38 发表 $ F' ~. f0 ]4 J/ m$ n

7 z& L( H4 O' v! |
4 `  A# @3 E. o9 Y3 \
" c+ Q0 x  w8 T* ?2 W好像以前听过这个脑筋急转弯问题:# [8 A( [$ E3 V5 T# L. l4 m; Z
“什么东西三只脚上山,四只脚下山“,8 X6 G. L- i; A; }; ?8 J
好像答案是”人“,三只脚上山,是人拄着一根拐杖上山,然后,下山的时候,手脚并用滚下来。
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真聪明,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 12:33 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
5 d1 w, L" M9 w& }
2 J4 |% o4 D2 P$ r真聪明,偶像啊

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$ K% H. R9 r+ L$ a. K7 b  g& ?全盘接受一下。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 13:38 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 12:33 发表 + n, `8 v7 c. ?6 Z
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全盘接受一下。

% |+ O! v$ z# `3 A$ C真虚怀若谷,偶像啊
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 13:38 发表
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真虚怀若谷,偶像啊

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7 y5 E$ V3 H/ x5 g! J: j5 n9 m
8 U- E! W+ _3 X6 S别把我往坏路上领啊。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 14:25 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 14:17 发表
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/ D; |% Q8 _7 T5 a) {6 J
1 ]1 C& s0 D( `( Z% l% ?1 b
: q+ ?% Q& j$ X  `2 {0 n4 z- J别把我往坏路上领啊。

4 N, V. R" E* {7 X, J! q8 s2 U0 L, L你已经在路上了
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发表于 2008-11-20 23:56 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-20 07:33 发表 ( P  i$ X+ F" G' \& r& o$ c- L& ]
加拿大人管纽芬兰省(newfoundland)的人叫newfie.

4 w) J1 B7 p( A* y多谢了,我查字典都没有查出来,后来在网上搜,搜出这个意思来,觉得不可信,原来真是这个意思。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-20 23:57 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 Irish 于 2008-11-20 08:56 发表
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真博学,偶像啊。
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大学教授哦,能不剥削?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 11:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 蓝色闪蝶 于 2008-11-20 23:57 发表
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) u: ^0 ]( U& v大学教授哦,能不剥削?
+ `2 j% H% ~( n
她是大学教瘦?
5 L4 P( J8 ~5 s5 Q1 S* H0 Q% M, u大学教胖还差不多 # g0 g/ z" N0 G6 Q+ T  ~' ]
她是NIBBLER(刚学来的,我同事居然说我也是
鲜花(1539) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 12:41 | 显示全部楼层
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-21 13:21 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 * s1 Q( v& Q. Q; N7 I1 P
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。
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说话真不动听 ,那叫卧底,无间道。
鲜花(1) 鸡蛋(0)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-21 21:21 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 眉心眉飞 于 2008-11-21 12:41 发表 " M; u5 |7 a, \+ Y* g) K. g' U
紧张的四下张望,你谁呀?貌似身边被安插了特务了。

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哈哈,你们在这开小会呢
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