 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : * l( G6 w# ^0 @5 O# t
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. # S6 |0 t ], e
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.1 i w; A1 E! w; d
; i) l+ m. h1 H: F# s( n5 vLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- * k7 a& }+ B9 E7 _
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.2 D0 X$ W2 o) e" M
4 B* P* L7 S* w3 y- _Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. + N5 V9 G* d+ Q4 I1 Q1 O
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..8 D" C& t& {) L* G
9 s4 m7 U; V$ E/ `6 BWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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+ l* {9 r, _* oWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 3 A/ i' R( I# t, D0 l& B% z+ t
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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& S% [. P4 s' g0 uShave armpits and legs.4 x4 h3 s7 d/ s9 ^$ ^- z0 p; o- Z
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.1 ?- G! L$ b* G) k! ]
8 t7 m* D p0 RSpray mold spots with Tilex. % b8 R6 t4 t$ L6 e9 _
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. s) W' A) v5 \0 b& D
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. / _8 a# B: [0 z
( U% A2 n! L* Q( oReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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. q% [6 w' Q8 l! c) K3 eIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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0 _5 I1 C' ], z) T2 i. jHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: % P- {7 a; p! j6 u5 `3 F/ a5 u" M z
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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$ p: A' `- P- i F) V/ R7 e2 iWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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3 J4 [1 ~& L3 p1 P, ULook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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, \0 o9 N* n7 W$ y9 e% b0 \/ ?Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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a6 J9 V* c. B9 `2 B fBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. # c; W# J9 A9 ]6 @* G
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. 5 [% O: p) V4 U- [
Y% L. z* j: U) l* iRinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 8 p, y9 N+ ~9 q# k/ U- P- S1 E: g5 M
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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! E7 f! \0 M" J8 u2 qIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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