Why God Made Moms!

老杨 · 发表于 2008-1-18 14:22

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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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5 S$ F: S2 k- W- {! w+ ?How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. / p0 j; q* v4 d  r- \; J
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. ; O: L, `3 \$ q' _) g0 K

, M: s; W% W6 E0 F, o5 cWhat kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice. 4 [6 v5 ]  m+ _

, O& c$ w, @; J/ j# J- M! {What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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% ?5 ]* H" g  j# H4 g2 U) ^Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. : ^2 g# y" a! ]" w( K+ k5 J/ u
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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+ l! z7 M# f$ ~# f7 H, K6 [What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 3 D9 \+ B- t, c; H/ u
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. / _1 T0 x, ~: i5 K

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

balubalu · 发表于 2008-1-18 15:19

There is a simple reason why GOD made MOMS. He wants to make DAD happy at night with no expense!

白水 · 发表于 2008-1-18 16:47

........哈哈哈哈

贾星星 · 发表于 2008-1-18 17:18

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-18 15:19 发表 6 k! t$ U$ d0 V! m! a1 W5 ]2 s
There is a simple reason why GOD made MOMS. He wants to make DAD happy at night with no expense!

You hit the point !

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 10:30

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-18 15:19 发表
, |, O; t+ U9 n3 bThere is a simple reason why GOD made MOMS. He wants to make DAD happy at night with no expense!

Even better in your house. Dad can make one dime or two for the service he provides to MOM. Oops! To be dead on balls accurate, your wife said one, for the quality of your service.

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 10:40

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-18 17:18 发表 E# R5 \ W# y# G$ B

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# ?2 `0 g: g: |9 Z0 r( \! ~) e: z3 xYou hit the point !

Hence pity on you! Because your ho gets paid for being laid.

贾星星 · 发表于 2008-1-20 11:13

原帖由三思于 2008-1-20 10:40 发表 * @1 E' }1 E3 |/ V8 z

: H& x/ [: r& l0 a5 WHence pity on you! Because your ho gets paid for being laid.

how much do you get paid for each time? basic service?

[ 本帖最后由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 11:15 编辑 ]

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 12:30

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 11:13 发表
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how much do you get paid for each time? basic service?

I get paid with love and resect. Woosh! Must be rocket science for you eh?

And just for your satisfaction of curiosity, we don't categorize in basic or full. We do everything and the kitchen sink, for our own pleasures.

莫迭儿 · 发表于 2008-1-20 13:26

原帖由三思于 2008-1-20 12:30 发表 6 x' W7 J' v h+ ~" g

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I get paid with love and resect. Woosh! Must be rocket science for you eh?
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And just for your satisfaction of curiosity, we don't categorize in basic or full. We do everything and the kitchen s ...

It's terrible...hohoho.. it should be " respect"...

Very smart answer, 34.

[ 本帖最后由莫迭儿于 2008-1-20 13:28 编辑 ]

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 13:42

原帖由 莫迭儿 于 2008-1-20 13:26 发表
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0 K" Z$ s, t, \6 {% z+ O# v8 AIt's terrible...hohoho.. it should be " respect"...
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Very smart answer, 34.

typo,thank you!

贾星星 · 发表于 2008-1-20 17:12

原帖由三思于 2008-1-20 12:30 发表
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I get paid with love and resect. Woosh! Must be rocket science for you eh?

Well, every man says that. No surprise!
Believe it or not, eventually they get what they want, right.
without paying cash.

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 17:26

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 17:12 发表
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' `& h6 P5 D) a& j- V2 TWell, every man says that. No surprise!: j$ w) h, \" `) [
Believe it or not, eventually they get what they want, right. ' f; R( g7 w( [( D. ?% k* ?
without paying cash.

Believe it or not, eventually we all cease to intercourse, rather we spoon and cuddle, chat and giggle. You can't imagine, can you? Becaue it is utterly out of your league.

[ 本帖最后由三思于 2008-1-20 17:40 编辑 ]

贾星星 · 发表于 2008-1-20 17:30

原帖由三思于 2008-1-20 17:26 发表
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9 d- o0 H. }4 v% N/ {Believe it or not, eventually we all cease to intercourse, rather we spoon and cuddle, chat and giggle. You can't imagine, can't you? Becaue it is utterly out of your league.

Well, you never know what he thought.
Man and women, is all about a business. Exchange.

He gets what he want, you get life insurance. Right.

叽里咕噜 · 发表于 2008-1-20 20:16

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 17:30 发表 . b4 E2 K, N% y6 G+ l
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2 i, a- ~1 \+ z- X2 ^0 w* m6 TWell, you never know what he thought. / ]; c' o0 D# k- v
Man and women, is all about a business. Exchange.1 z0 k3 m" g1 M

& E. @$ \. @5 O. ~1 q; dHe gets what he want, you get life insurance. Right.

You are so damn naive. Is that really so simple in your mind about the relationship between husband and wife?

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-20 20:49

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 17:30 发表 ' w3 c5 `4 G8 x0 Y$ S$ C7 ~. n. n
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6 C1 s" C" T3 ^; ?! K  wWell, you never know what he thought.
: t1 X8 i- ?  }) G+ M' ^Man and women, is all about a business. Exchange.8 |3 o  K6 ^1 k3 v  p: }2 o8 c

3 U7 ]+ f% ]- N& B9 SHe gets what he want, you get life insurance. Right.

In your case, the die is cast.

OliveOil · 发表于 2008-1-21 11:00

原帖由 luckibird2 于 2008-1-20 17:30 发表
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* n" S" e1 u8 v( j) W. i. \# XWell, you never know what he thought.
$ D6 q5 O* c2 X' `& P7 ZMan and women, is all about a business. Exchange.
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He gets what he want, you get life insurance. Right.

Don't compare your own little bird with eagles. How can you offer your so-called life insurance? You may have to risk your life to get fed. Of course you have to be in business.

No wonder you think this way though. I can't blame you.

[ 本帖最后由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 11:05 编辑 ]

OliveOil · 发表于 2008-1-21 11:02

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-18 15:19 发表 0 p6 G' l: R, X; w' R9 d% Z
There is a simple reason why GOD made MOMS. He wants to make DAD happy at night with no expense!

Was your daddy happy? Just wondering... Is that why you love or hate mummy?

[ 本帖最后由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 11:04 编辑 ]

贾星星 · 发表于 2008-1-21 14:05

原帖由 叽里咕噜 于 2008-1-20 20:16 发表 # F% |' V8 f6 q/ D+ t! f) m0 a: x
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, M+ ]0 q g" `! I& l) f# RYou are so damn naive. Is that really so simple in your mind about the relationship between husband and wife?

Stupid dumb fool. None of your business.

balubalu · 发表于 2008-1-21 14:36

原帖由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 11:02 发表
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4 Q0 W! k$ x+ G, S/ K- N4 ZWas your daddy happy? Just wondering... Is that why you love or hate mummy?

Do you wanna make my dad happy?

Regarding Mummy, I havn't seen one yet. I know they are hidding at somewhere Egypt.

OliveOil · 发表于 2008-1-21 15:47

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-21 14:36 发表 " m) [6 r2 a: `
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Do you wanna make my dad happy? / W. N* U7 r! Y6 l& F0 `! I
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Regarding Mummy, I havn't seen one yet. I know they are hidding at somewhere Egypt.

I don't think people like you can possibly have a mom, gotta be mummy. If you don't believe it, ask your dad.

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-21 16:10

原帖由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 15:47 发表
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% D6 h6 j# {9 @' Y5 t1 x0 hI don't think people like you can possibly have a mom, gotta be mummy. If you don't believe it, ask your dad.

I see. it is called necrophilia.

balubalu · 发表于 2008-1-21 17:41

原帖由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 15:47 发表 / z$ C) S0 _6 `

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! W/ T* S2 u! B8 f8 j- h* }: iI don't think people like you can possibly have a mom, gotta be mummy. If you don't believe it, ask your dad.

You make me happy, I tell you the truth.

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-21 17:43

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-21 17:41 发表
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. t9 O( ~7 r. [ i# Z/ TYou make me happy, I tell you the truth.

shut up and cool off. You started this shit what do you expect.

OliveOil · 发表于 2008-1-21 19:14

原帖由 balubalu 于 2008-1-21 17:41 发表 0 ^" f1 w3 ^& z* b, F. f2 m4 J
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You make me happy, I tell you the truth.

Huh you are pretty good at fanticizing...like your daddy?

Oh did your kids know you hired or bought their mom?

By the way, you may want to check if your skin is still attached

OliveOil · 发表于 2008-1-21 19:17

原帖由三思于 2008-1-21 17:43 发表
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shut up and cool off. You started this shit what do you expect.

What's that thing? I am wondering where it learned to speak.

balubalu · 发表于 2008-1-21 19:56

原帖由三思于 2008-1-21 17:43 发表 : i3 Y' e/ p+ M( V% Y

4 |8 f1 r8 {# C& `6 r, zshut up and cool off. You started this shit what do you expect.

forget it. you guys are taking it seriously. no fun to talk to you!

[ 本帖最后由 balubalu 于 2008-1-21 20:39 编辑 ]

三思 · 发表于 2008-1-21 21:25

原帖由 OliveOil 于 2008-1-21 19:17 发表 x( M+ a. S- G) d- ^' c% z
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: y1 s% P0 Q0 _* b# e: j0 cWhat's that thing? I am wondering where it learned to speak.

balu is just being naughty. never mind.

寒江雪 · 发表于 2008-1-21 22:13

According to Bible, man was created by God first. But when God see that the man so lonely, he created a women with a rib of the man.

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