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8 c5 T/ o% D. t% j1 q; `) cWhy did God make mothers? w& m9 K6 v) h/ H, v. u* m
! {# F1 Y* _( u+ G2 h" K1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.) J9 U& I0 w; r! g
2. Mostly to clean the house. " m. x9 z: Y. Y! d, z
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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* u. N$ l1 n N& L+ n* fHow did God make mothers? ! Y8 ]* H( B L$ |- x
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
# V2 r$ E6 r9 |7 D- \! ]0 J2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
, A" ~# Y% Y/ N+ {8 p3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. ; W# ?. L) @$ V' U& D
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? 8 N, |/ D) I! H+ n4 ^- u: x* R7 @
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 7 W! z2 D( P% o/ Q
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. - f0 k% J7 C; S) L% u' ?8 H
/ P5 `8 u; q# g5 `4 kWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1 B6 r! \' P: L' Y" ]. }1. We're related.
" w$ G9 p7 Q* f2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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% j' X1 i0 ~$ z9 tWhat kind of little girl was your mom? % Z* S, D* O$ b' v- P7 _* X. t
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 9 y6 n; e3 I3 ]0 K
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. % b, B; u. x1 X$ {- n% z
3. They say she used to be nice. 7 o6 M- Z* j+ k6 l' d
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
5 S2 r0 `: P+ ~: y* P1. His last name.
- Q, h2 F! \' M2 p, C' u2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
L# Z# \5 t5 f; i' g# |; p4 {3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? " m0 Z2 b! J7 p- U2 g
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
* n9 _2 l4 d" E9 h1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
6 Z2 O; A5 R+ D# z; F, B3 G2. She got too old to do anything else with him. - r, {- v1 z; ?0 I. S7 E) ^
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. ! ^5 l8 e+ A$ x6 {# ^7 v
0 n8 F6 v/ Y8 w/ k* l7 FWho's the boss at your house? ) l6 E) n9 l/ |' d* X& @
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
1 ^/ x: A" K7 `0 L P; ?2 z1 b2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.: c+ y( E4 K7 E' G, Q
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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' |7 T9 W/ s( [What's the difference between moms & dads? $ J0 D' I' n6 T# w
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
; N5 W% O6 V" ]7 w$ a5 n( v5 Q2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.( A, k' A) n( v7 t. m+ N
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. : }1 k: \9 |0 S( s" X6 p3 s" y4 d
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. , U1 B# G$ N. n- ?
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
- A3 r/ t+ R; y- ?6 |. K1 _8 Q1. Mothers don't do spare time.+ g3 L" @' z% @9 Y# O6 r
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 7 j( j( u. J: V r8 _5 L
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? 5 U. q5 Q% y. U7 \/ V8 j5 f' t
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
4 P7 O2 E% M, Z1 Y3 e$ ^2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
4 S9 g; `6 h; F( h) C' a/ F1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
7 D- v( u- y9 E4 J2 A2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
, q4 g5 y8 t: v3 M5 Y3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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