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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 6 N6 p) `" M: ], @+ N3 l
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ( p8 o5 d* P. a( n- }* n
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. 0 w1 K# E# G- w5 A1 i* K
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 7 j+ V" b. i! S6 n8 u' a0 j" w
5. Weed
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7 q* j- S# @( x# VTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA $ a* y3 T6 k, r* u" Y
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
$ D' @( }. [# J0 q: {2. Ottawa who?
( F3 f& C" }% f3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. R) s r, c/ b4 C
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. , W+ L' p/ t ?2 e: v" U6 t2 p
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
; Q9 n' q7 n- E+ I X& O% @; U6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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0 U, J6 I& L1 n9 x% R# v5 o- |TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN . W2 a3 a' O: Q. \2 z3 x+ I4 Y
3 B3 R0 J% C S1. You never run out of wheat.
9 h* ^% O7 b5 B" k/ T) t2. Your province is really easy to draw.
, ~3 M0 g0 @6 r" \) y* Q- _3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ( K* t% n8 ]3 G" N' y) G2 C
4. People will assume you live on a farm. ' r* d! a' }) t, J. }, L @0 c4 @
! V* L* Q1 D+ ~9 o& S" U; ]TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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4 M; b) W+ i7 r* J: |' W3 m+ Z2 o1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
, q5 w, K! F. Q3 ?- D2 M2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
5 d/ G( r7 c$ k+ a. @' H% ^3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
" H6 u) Q( w( |5 O) z4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
. {! t" C) v4 L8 H) I, {9 l, D; N5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by. 9 k" B% H% v* M& X. H% k# D
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1 Q3 |+ l3 S& G2 e+ [TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO ; c) I% Q- p4 W; B8 e; J
! l. H8 `1 S; @ ~3 D# Y$ L9 [1. You live in the centre of the universe. ; S0 \2 L# r5 j4 s$ m- u) F+ s
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
9 }! O, _& g J0 y: `# `3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
+ T0 |. t" B" F' A) V- e4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. & b; I! P& t' \& W, J4 k; l
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7 R& o' e* f8 v) g! ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC Q" a8 k* |3 F# y9 U
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
3 d# i0 l) z2 P# F9 G) }9 a/ H! ?2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. * G: R; T6 L, Y3 t% W( ~1 h
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. ' }% @+ K0 b& I9 U% ?
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *4 H. J; J% }! }$ ?4 L/ U
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 1 {) e8 S! A, |4 i1 Y, \
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. , G) z" S( D3 o0 J8 O
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. ' }% m B# u; A+ W
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick ( [5 s- X8 T4 U9 q5 M4 H) u$ O* t
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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$ k7 R: l4 k, K' e3 z+ nTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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& |5 g4 W; U. Z4 W7 {1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
' r$ Z& \5 ?8 w2 r$ K' q3 V2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 5 ~' M7 x7 T6 U! i2 ~8 ?' K6 O9 v
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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' a5 N" `+ \ C% BTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 3 t7 C. T* `$ r" \
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ; S6 S3 @; v, ?" @# A# E0 m
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
* ]$ F" j J" c3 y3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
% h; X/ _2 v& ^6 ^ ]* q1 `: K' Z0 B4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
( i) |, c, k6 _( ~8 P) F5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. - H1 n9 x' {1 U( [* u
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 2 ]0 x- g' \* ~4 P! }
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& q1 C5 ~5 L- R8 k l+ vTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND % w9 n. O5 c' }, x
" z+ f v6 e. d( {- ^1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
, e8 |4 Z3 X2 k% t) V W7 X2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. 4 B. A& s9 _8 e. p, a0 B
3. The workday is about two hours long.
, x* y8 W& ]: O; m# D0 n4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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