 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
0 K" l2 P$ ~8 d0 O& U; i% A6 C. ]; r& f请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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2 p; D' h+ G& P! r( n1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.5 Z) w+ t1 I3 L6 }1 G
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
4 l( J4 V9 j/ ^* r( y9 u5 ^down.
/ T& i5 [ J. N2 AWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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; B* i" H$ g- ?leaving it down.
- F# ` r2 R T6 u1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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) O4 W6 j' f% r5 f m% |1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides., Y3 n# v8 s+ @" z- X/ u) a3 W
Let it be.2 q& a3 k+ `: E: x/ j a- D
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去$ k5 X0 Z; U1 | t' S+ F
; ^3 `2 t+ H& e5 f1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
6 Z: Q: l! M0 }# }0 E- Nthat way.7 F$ n* A8 x6 h0 V
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！8 j# F* Y, n% y) |
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1. Crying is blackmail.
4 E4 M, T" w; d0 O8 ~3 o1，哭泣是敲诈
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- z9 @* j* j& Z& _7 M( \1. Ask for what you want.
1 P, s0 ^4 w* u, |6 R1 pLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
2 i) i; T1 Z' V" z1 ~Strong hints do not work!' k( T) k {' A9 @# S
Obvious hints do not work!
+ d1 ?, q, s2 j* {/ K, L" KJust say it!
: T! _- Q6 n5 o* R7 T' |1，你想要什么就说" G5 Y0 ^7 C9 {, h
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！+ N" N; j5 K# n6 O! M
; t8 h" n- ^, e0 p' ~( o: A1 J) N1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every # o6 x# X/ t! | B: o" U0 Q
question.$ C' X) O9 C: K) G( i- w& e
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）( n+ X9 }) V- n( N1 [# T2 ? {* }
; _! h. h% z% K' a8 Q+ J. O) f1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's$ {# K0 S/ @7 K6 N9 I
what we do.
" t1 s9 L" }* }! s! H' {% L1 J& VSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
# r8 N6 G# @6 _1 R1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.' U5 K \7 d7 ] {
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去- p! K1 y. i$ r' U7 M# t* A2 I
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.+ F5 H+ s3 j! T% w7 z! Q
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.( j4 S/ p. b+ a9 P
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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9 t% X# N* E7 I# S1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
$ A% O- q$ _, b- yto act like soap opera guys.
* ?# A) k" x/ g2 c9 w' G7 b1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们4 s* F( J, _4 L$ Z$ L2 F' g
c$ ?' @! ^5 y% M. K& H" g1 B1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
: u, S# m( E6 ~, h1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1 q. [1 o. x1 A7 F1 O/ a9 d1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
2 d7 F0 K6 E \1 j# X% cmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.# {% {' F* j7 G2 h# x+ K
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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' o+ c6 A Y0 w- ^（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）( [/ V6 W5 j5 P
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it' N1 v" Q8 m, k2 X% n; d8 _
done. Not both.
" H* b0 ] K4 s. L XIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.4 e% x+ g5 ]( I" M c! T# s; K: ?
/ Q( i8 `8 e$ A1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
! q$ f8 X+ q( l( D lcommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.3 w; D3 h% I4 I: U8 _2 W
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
. [; L8 U, a7 [4 cPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.$ y6 J4 [' Y- d
We have no idea what mauve is." \# {- E" |: R4 N1 c- C7 i1 L
* n- x) t" b2 z: k) o1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.1 A8 L8 T4 x9 L8 W" w) v4 M( O) i
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like& m5 u' `- K/ T7 _" s
nothing's wrong.
4 C/ {: F) n/ g9 sWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.8 `3 z4 e" g; {
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer' }3 J2 n$ h$ e- b7 z! Y& B# D6 w3 i
you don't want to hear. H: E" _/ a! q# ~, l: J4 [9 W
9 V+ v1 i1 C3 A; i1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
- ^( }# b" o6 ufine...Really.
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: j' t5 K; J I0 r8 ^! m2 H# J8 G1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to6 ^. w) r6 U! `0 _
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.( a+ L" u0 m& B+ q( ?' p3 g q* ]8 m
: M7 A) F7 @+ v1. You have too many shoes.
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" _* q& t- M9 z5 v& C1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!( E/ E9 F! e& ~8 P4 f; j* f( v
; @! ]+ m, g4 m# @+ |8 Q# N1. Thank you for reading this.0 Y, K- n& Q. w/ U$ G+ ~; Z4 h
3 y W$ O$ }- g9 ?% vYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
* F- }( V" ^; i) P" F1 H- ZBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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$ K) H/ W( H4 l3 V0 J' j- a% V( fPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
3 n9 j4 k( r) {7 T) |* f9 SPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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