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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
! c' W" P5 H  V3 D; @) B6 `4 ]请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
& k) f, D3 A8 f1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫0 w4 ~" t; K/ ?4 q! S5 G3 H

5 Z5 @' s, q# }$ q' ?2 v1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it/ h& T; K- j: Z& E+ ^
down.
! K8 y8 U) P( s* `; w# wWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
0 J0 u/ B2 [* R/ uyou( z2 R0 ^! m2 z. g
leaving it down./ d( ?( O3 y. Q
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?3 ~0 H! p4 ~5 \1 O  Q9 o
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
/ j- d. C: S" R# t0 iLet it be.
) e1 D( l/ }; k: ]  P  @1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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: q8 G6 `* T0 o4 H" M- z1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it6 i: B4 ^9 R+ L% o
that way.& G' u( W* M) J2 ?( b
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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- e0 n# Z3 |' s8 }1. Crying is blackmail.
5 e9 g* ~1 \% y4 }4 R1,哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.3 k# Q( o$ ]9 }9 P7 w9 T
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!1 u4 S4 _! x0 q7 a3 {  S5 I. N
Strong hints do not work!
6 ~9 s1 Z, X3 Y; D' `, X% e- PObvious hints do not work!
+ X) w. ~& G5 w' E& AJust say it!4 ?: I( |2 p0 ^1 v
1,你想要什么就说% |+ X2 L0 y) _' N' l- o2 C9 |
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!6 `! y2 b# e6 J* u" |& D: x
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
6 n4 l9 S6 e0 c7 B) [( Bquestion.
+ r- e: }  }5 Q1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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- S- L' w1 s& Y  G' V" I* C, e$ ]- \1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's4 w$ C6 B9 U6 w* j
what we do." ?! ?4 }0 P9 T" Z% r* w8 q
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
" A  u! \! a# I% D' x2 b+ |1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。+ s$ L  V+ I5 v% T2 S% w

' M/ L7 O* R. \8 b5 h: x: P# o1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.
, U8 v% B1 o( k) {1 m1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去
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3 j+ p0 Y" k9 h. G% x1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.- t: M* V' t& U8 H
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
8 t0 S1 ^$ h( R! c3 J9 z我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了, ~6 M5 l" o: X# X& E, Y0 @6 L

4 [* Y6 c  m4 L. S; g/ t+ ]1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
& u3 }& {4 B  h' Zto act like soap opera guys.
* |( `1 Z1 r% K) G, o/ ^8 j1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.$ f) k/ y& W) C
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们2 i2 C3 ]8 {2 i, H" M# n! Q

) q) `) B  {* [/ Y# F4 k1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways3 Q& b6 a# T/ ^" D  X
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.
/ a/ c: m( V& o% s9 `$ A6 {; l) w1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)+ z  n3 K* t# c+ ]1 Q$ ]" A9 Q3 d
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it4 o! C0 `- Z, O+ u$ M; s/ l$ Q
done. Not both.
8 P# m# C' \/ `If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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- V; h7 q6 a! D/ O  m1 ]1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during* l# X1 d9 z$ w) f# V8 J1 U
commercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.( \0 s" `  d! e' q, }
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.' d7 ?; p: n/ S
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.3 ~0 P! _( S$ g1 C2 S2 J
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.3 U" w7 B6 _9 Q/ @9 `
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
  [/ k! n" @+ I/ H8 w' M0 znothing's wrong.
4 T* m7 e( Q- R: \: k# b+ YWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.2 s6 Q; D  |  v: ~! ^4 y3 x
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
. G# Y# E. H& \5 U/ g& gyou don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
3 y! f, q( j. s  n+ Xfine...Really." t5 @1 ~( h; S# v5 u

; @8 g* t& ]7 Y; o1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
3 J) ?% I5 H( {" f+ W# e! g- ?: ^# vdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.1 P1 k* M+ {/ O1 ?; u, `6 x
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1. You have enough clothes.. C! x3 \+ T+ e& o) Z

1 i- E/ f+ F: S  E# Z1. You have too many shoes.9 c/ s) g$ t* g6 Z) K% @6 N
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!3 o. I& A& @+ x
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1. Thank you for reading this./ A% c" i9 ~- P8 ?* I; a/ r$ |7 d# t
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;+ D8 U7 s+ r. Z; P4 K- P3 a
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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+ A6 x& z9 B; M& F: d( `* cPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
' r% F; Z. j! e  MPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。/ x/ i% f  P6 b1 ~
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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4 n4 Z* Q4 Y, n, m1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
( C& p' l2 E7 {; Y) g3 ?我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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" S. C5 ^. Q2 ?5 X1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is., Q  j6 B& s# X6 }- I( c* j' A% [
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。0 c8 b; z- \0 F  f3 |$ n! ^

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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
0 K: c/ v/ S  X! U如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
% a0 C+ O) e# [2 K, u# |如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。5 M0 @3 S) T2 m4 z% q/ @' S
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& r4 F% D8 u; E0 g7 O" W( L5 L9 T1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.
5 u) z' T/ Z' c0 m! W: s如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:8 j0 r" ^7 f6 U7 y
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
' F0 _" W/ p1 A0 h# {4 X+ }0 a7 Y所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。# q: i+ V+ x! ^+ `' u' j
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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! f6 k5 @) e$ A: B5 v还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.
% B1 I# F9 m. P" H/ y- s; @3 v如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你6 @+ S( f8 ^  _* i- G; `
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8 W/ y* d; F" b% D3 p1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
/ r$ S) J, G3 L( H$ H& w不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。/ w4 e. [! j+ y4 {9 F% n9 k3 }5 o- G  Y

- g. ~; C) E. d0 ]' r& }. m9 r1. You have enough clothes., w2 O+ q: r7 C
你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes.
# f1 E  s: k- {+ e$ {你的鞋子也太多了吧1 D8 v: P+ n0 _

! A, }  i" q- _0 J% _1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!6 j$ s; k" y/ o% Q3 B
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.+ f. N" e% h6 q& o7 Z9 v" P
多谢你能看完这个8 G' P+ w/ |% \3 D8 `3 Z
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
+ |1 I, J4 y2 V; q我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置- r" k7 G) I9 u, ^' A9 ^
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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% R2 {" s8 J' p0 H0 A( V玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:6 w% u' C4 L$ a' ?
1. You have enough clothes.0 ]: N$ i/ c4 `' {& T, ^
你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes.: W# H4 W2 I6 M- ?  y  _
你的鞋子也太多了吧
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这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?- d0 R/ b; P% w: z7 x
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----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.% _; R8 I5 a" ]1 N" R! ^
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!6 v- D/ E2 f$ D4 O+ j) i7 F5 w
Strong hints do not work!
" F" c6 _/ `- l# @; R- GObvious hints do not work!
1 b. G+ V* z; i' `) ^( n; g5 `Just say it!. t) m4 R) d5 A8 Q( o9 S0 y
1,你想要什么就说6 X. g& v0 A$ m9 ]3 R: d! y
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!5 [" Q* @) i( z. n' ~$ H

1 V5 w9 g- [, ?/ `& c  C关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
9 D* U8 H, V4 N: O1 h2 [( x5 O1. Ask for what you want.
0 p8 [; O( f$ m6 U0 sLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
5 O, I$ b  n" L5 A' e( JStrong hints do not work!
0 E4 l/ X* ?2 f+ L- I; e8 P) JObvious hints do not work!
. o0 u* D' q. I) @Just say it!
* `7 R3 Y& U5 S( A$ D1,你想要什么就说! f( m6 d9 ~+ b; T5 `& s; G# T% q
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
4 D, C9 F( m2 r" S1 v$ a8 n% N( L被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????

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$ Y" X5 O$ y: n4 E咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:: D* N* S) @4 S
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。: I6 b3 g% |% I7 i  V, K

& |/ s2 l3 y0 n0 }$ c还想问问你的体会呢!

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体会?
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$ ?) q# F$ z  |- w7 u$ N8 T( O* f回答到那个帖子下面了
大型搬家
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