 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!! ~. h& t- g1 B7 \$ L
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写6 t$ P$ f1 B) o4 U* ~- g+ j
0 D% h9 t8 A% j% \: Z
1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.& H1 f U! ~' z2 ~# b2 f3 r
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
9 l, s6 R9 w. }5 k3 U
1 v! x5 V9 u7 e. s) g* p Z1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it r1 [0 z4 W8 P4 m
down.
3 r) V9 w+ s( n! tWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
# T* J9 u$ B- o5 Z8 i' Hyou1 a# A# l- o( F e7 F7 F# @
leaving it down.0 b: ?- O* P t1 d" o+ ]. r
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？3 r+ q3 k l7 t3 s" _
7 X, t; f, S# ^: }0 W5 n, P
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.9 r9 c/ _( N9 x
Let it be.
2 Q. E7 e7 w; ?0 I- W) A1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
: ^7 K- G8 S2 l; S6 {1 q
# f- N5 Q; |4 u; _: D; i. r0 A1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
5 g. O( r7 n+ ?3 pthat way.4 n5 D l* E9 x+ e) Y" g! z# m' R! l+ N
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
( t: z; ~% ?9 E3 c( y8 ] N$ s9 O; d* _& q9 R# ~$ e& D/ O
1. Crying is blackmail.
. {$ @4 }+ U4 s8 _! p( R1，哭泣是敲诈
- q6 w0 P% S# _ Q- j n. u4 z8 k/ B0 z/ X
1. Ask for what you want." X/ {1 I1 w9 ^2 ~) u
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
2 L) q: _! H2 l% }9 HStrong hints do not work!
" K+ Y: z" w; M) c8 L3 r( NObvious hints do not work!
3 ?6 p, }+ g" M5 l# H. ?2 Q. [Just say it!
! \1 Q. b- r. R7 M1，你想要什么就说) w0 `( P" ^' m7 F+ `' ]
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！) j {- E' H2 T2 V. ]" S; R9 T
) b* n" z7 n1 _, g, ]* H
1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
: n$ X n6 _2 @3 b ^' hquestion.0 [% b* Q0 d, {0 U
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
: b1 M& u* e( |! f; G% P1 a' Q. @" k0 P
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's6 ]8 K" @3 D$ ^- j, |5 q
what we do.
. O5 V9 x& K& m8 Z% n3 p5 j7 G7 OSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
2 o6 r! D- K! Y( b2 G) X1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
$ r- W1 K1 X6 l- i/ O2 y( C; ^1 _# E+ M1 ?* y% h2 K/ P
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
3 ^( I3 A3 n x) Q# m1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
& ?0 r1 u1 q2 N1 j* _3 m( U: [# n$ t+ V ^: x
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
! L5 o& J! E) ~: E' ^2 t7 hIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.0 U% u; j) f ] W9 x' B' {+ Q
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了3 R8 z p6 R/ F' C' X
! C5 h# Q5 C" \: r( W& y3 v
1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
* ^0 N" `5 T( t! N/ Oto act like soap opera guys./ W7 P8 n5 `" }! P K/ A* Q# N
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
+ C# |! q L- S! L7 H! i s `/ t3 k, T1 f% i( O. ~
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.% F) [. d; R6 H3 \
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
9 @2 `* ?/ g- ?8 b: q% X3 o! B6 d) P/ _0 _1 L2 C( O! k8 w6 y5 H* o# m
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
) O3 c" N/ u- e- p! _2 _makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
' w) |* ]/ ^& U m* D3 ^& p1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。% X p+ ]" ^$ ]+ _4 T
k7 v' N" r. Q2 [
（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）/ U1 v/ i( F8 m
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
: C, O) w5 a4 ], O& ?: a7 | Odone. Not both.
4 Q# Q( s9 f9 p/ PIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.9 o) U/ v" k* ^0 Q5 |+ m
; n2 j# e, r5 c3 O* v4 e1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during8 F2 }# L+ u3 S h$ C; [
commercials.: ?0 N9 J" Y9 i. g
Z+ t9 Z7 ^" o* P
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.2 z0 a( Z h* w2 t: J& [
4 m' q& A8 P/ W$ G0 L' c1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings." x- j5 A, {! D# M
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.4 ^7 I; |0 K+ V( P
We have no idea what mauve is.
' l- W$ y4 i* W7 a1 K' P, X0 x' ]; l3 ^, S# i0 H
1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
( e9 o$ B2 _+ P; ~' s# G& i, Y' s$ M$ I
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like+ @# @( ] S* [, @( b& w* H4 C9 O
nothing's wrong.- Q& l, p; v/ C6 U% Q9 ]0 h
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle./ p* q; @3 I0 w0 _+ Z, u {% @2 `4 O
6 {5 l6 L: `# g0 d9 D# N5 d) s1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer& @# u0 ]- G( @1 o4 c
you don't want to hear.6 L+ Y# W) {( A' c# L0 P4 f
3 r4 h9 C! d0 f+ z5 [1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
; ~( C; v/ ^- L( a: B6 ?/ vfine...Really.# ^* P1 ^( W: s, E" l, z
( k7 _2 X7 d* u0 z# N7 Q2 h' R
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
; p4 `* N; b2 B6 W8 M( \- W$ Xdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
+ `3 n) }3 v' o% v- T. I
, Z H1 S" S* L4 K+ s1. You have enough clothes.# f. T: |2 w/ q" K
) Y* ?1 M# {9 ?' r* A7 D2 S0 A( u& L
1. You have too many shoes.* x& A8 ~% t$ Q5 l8 Y* L
! N! H" f/ @* e' P0 C
1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!3 [9 w# f7 d: S6 a! p/ T
- Q$ L4 `3 R6 p3 g6 Q0 S6 H2 J
1. Thank you for reading this.
+ e, }" `3 d( w7 m: x2 E
1 Q1 m! P5 W3 P* j& z& lYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
$ @% w: s- v1 x4 U$ q! y' ^$ |) xBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.$ s4 E& f0 z; B& O Q
% x; |) V5 B; m% V8 D3 S, _6 V
Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
6 r0 P9 Y" j6 l8 Z$ y$ \3 Y4 GPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
: o- N( J! U% v0 ~1 ` ^' W: b