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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:5 P, x2 v6 ]& o7 k% D1 f' J
/ f* |4 w% t8 {: c3 i' ?1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
, Y( T. N* T$ E. O) ehour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
) F3 R" S( }4 t" T$ H# Rmorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
. O; t4 [5 R! A4 Ayou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a; |" o6 Z" F! M/ H9 w0 i
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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- h$ ?1 \! M. j# S1 g6 Z4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
A- P9 y; ]8 [% W- Qown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest! i% p5 N7 |, X- B: u& ^" v. a
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires( O/ f& p9 I. P4 s9 z
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
9 `6 a- x9 O- v# w3 ]! r+ ^: vphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
8 @8 ?- y7 p! qcussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can* v. T" F, U6 p0 w
get you shot.% e! E& B8 W$ n+ W
2 M7 ]1 v- q1 @( i7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
- b' p7 k- T/ O" ~5 ~3 W& jhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
' t* Y% W+ d' ? n' N0 @the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot! P; \( Q7 ]5 {: k; v+ @0 C
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first* a/ P2 R+ e- o4 }: U! m+ H
vehicle through the intersection.
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour( M6 X/ d( k1 c4 g/ J; I, x
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
1 \: J" D3 l% Eday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and
. C) ]% K5 c' N' d1 O$ smore construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
& l- e: N9 V4 B: l1 X" ideer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage," o; [ U: ^: m( p. U9 w
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.3 ^7 e* Q- w4 N$ x m% v' s. W
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same: q$ ?) v4 h, b8 S
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye7 x8 ?1 T. m \7 w% F
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and" m! `5 O' C3 N2 M2 E4 B
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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' T' T- | g" q, a, k! t' M11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the3 y( ?# ]/ q7 G1 g; @' u5 S
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally' Q* r2 Y' |- x' Y. h- L
Activated.' Y+ e9 |5 {2 j! r0 N0 ^) [
6 x% S% D9 y3 u* v8 } H& i* O12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,3 L" U& W9 o; L: s _
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
+ K4 C! `& u- k1 O' v$ v8 Waccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
/ I7 A7 J, V# v9 ?lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
6 F# ^0 [. G% f" K2 Y e e( bblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
