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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house8 R, M" Y6 G, W
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse./ G9 }$ Q* c; }. c; l* q& i# l: e
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
% W* Q1 L. P# O+ UCause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.- Y$ ]( L2 r8 q2 f6 l8 y( G
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.9 j; y$ T! Z% I* P
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
" a/ ^: F. ^! g: eHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,. C2 C0 M1 r# k6 c( G
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
+ T* P6 A2 o3 ^6 D+ v) GFrom the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
7 V T6 _. G0 r" s. s1 wTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news./ y8 x! O! I$ R7 L- A- j& W
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,
' w& s5 K4 A$ g. yWhen not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.( [0 ]$ n7 m8 \2 j2 h
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
% y+ A, l7 e- z( GTiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .. Z. C% B2 d3 g! g, d
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
9 i! R2 Z% `4 H- i2 k0 P"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."* p1 Y0 t9 a3 o8 \: j0 x, e$ i4 f
She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,. f5 o' {! g. L6 H$ N1 n; z
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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