 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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" U! R1 W! f; g# \# AI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.; v1 g9 X7 a# h2 C
6 A, @! C( t+ j! _( W% V1 O: ~I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:) F. v: `+ F9 e/ Y9 P% ^* _
- P% i; H/ f- n+ }8 ~8 t& S9 W"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:' n' f5 L+ d& K9 ]6 s5 _
1 U' @3 K8 W' F, K# M5 e"What's the 2nd Amendment?"6 Q% a. A3 B5 p3 l/ ], B
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?": X) e! R7 {! o* t
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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n6 ^* C' w5 xI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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+ K6 [( ~; c! l: i* L# ~So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.- p/ E! T- F5 {; m+ ?1 F
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Thank you very much!- r; |. L0 x( F- w3 q
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., t/ L1 y1 L( f, b
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.& Y: ]# s' W! a+ B
) ?+ D0 J- a% J/ i2 V- r"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".: F1 s4 _' |$ f- L! Z V
" }# H: k& J+ p8 O) H- \Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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