埃德蒙顿华人社区-Edmonton China

 找回密码
 注册
查看: 1525|回复: 0

Crazy English! Zt

[复制链接]
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-4-25 10:55 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
ZT
1 }9 |2 k5 T% O0 Z
- _  T1 T; `2 z% m9 ^$ _. V, `
' X7 T0 {$ Z; ], Q0 d" KCrazy English!7 \; N2 D6 }7 L4 A* k
) z" r  a$ y6 j  e2 P
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes; But the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.4 B: q1 f$ ~/ k5 H% |+ `' b( H
$ L# F+ m" \- c  h/ R
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese, Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.: n3 p- J0 d8 @' p3 Q3 W0 s
! z" i7 B( Y! E. Q0 L  a
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice; Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
5 i6 V8 M  S0 H  I+ I, Y6 }' f. r+ M4 J" C. {* I
If the plural of man is always called men, Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?( E, X3 i) @: h/ y+ Y  o

: B1 ^% R% h% y. }  U% nIf I spoke of my foot and show you my feet, And I give you a boot, would a pair be a beet?
; }$ R- K, _1 ^4 s+ Y. R
# a, B4 d- w0 Z1 Y, a  E' |If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth, Why shouldn't the plural of booths be called beet?
0 }8 ~; [2 @, ~' l0 l6 ^8 @! V
- d; @9 V4 p& X7 jThen one may be that, and three would be those, Yet hat in the plural would never be hose, and the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
0 t3 K( d; \" m4 w6 a9 ~* k% N$ K
0 a  F/ Y& m* f4 b  u! eWe speak of a brother and also of brethren, But though we say mother, we never say methren.
1 N% S) i; s0 Q) S( ~$ V
) q! T  ], V) v7 `2 @$ OThen the masculine pronouns are he, his and him, But imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.5 [" \3 v# ?: }6 m

- |/ H/ Y: j! E- d5 zLet's face it, English is a crazy language!
* V# O- g( `# c- s. N6 j
- w( f6 X/ ?$ g$ dThere is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in a hamburger; Neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England.2 D2 H7 e6 x& Q4 `0 ]
. }( J$ y/ [2 e
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing, Grocers done groce and hammers don't hamm?
- x) ?" [) y; l* G+ A, {: c' M, q
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend?
3 O  @5 U7 I! {# j* h+ P& W, X, j4 T1 l0 \4 P+ {  ]
If you have a bunch of odds & ends, And get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
/ w, M% o% J. u1 u9 y3 |5 u0 g1 a2 Q! v3 Z
If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?
4 q% Y/ _0 s0 _/ q3 ]& F: \9 p: h8 i* y0 @9 z" M
If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?+ @# Z) L. s0 j. s: e# [
% ]# O1 _) b3 R0 v, z
In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?( w2 Y0 c1 e  a/ P" C5 N

; m( ?! Q1 E) E1 Z3 lShip by truck and send cargo by ship?
0 R- M7 d  v5 H1 O% K- q$ k' G, Q" l8 N! v
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
1 `% Q2 u, T5 O% ?/ T* g9 A4 w' Q# ]! u8 P
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
  j4 [7 g6 ~1 a- \! ^8 l) Q
* z4 k: t8 O- dYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your6 J9 `. q# C8 N$ l7 f, q
House burns down; in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on!' E8 q9 l4 ~7 L0 ~- ?# U) T6 O6 D

. ^) Q6 S; J, ~+ P6 sSometimes, I think all the folks who grew up speaking English Should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane
您需要登录后才可以回帖 登录 | 注册

本版积分规则

联系我们|小黑屋|手机版|Archiver|埃德蒙顿中文网

GMT-7, 2026-2-14 18:34 , Processed in 0.123883 second(s), 9 queries , Gzip On, APC On.

Powered by Discuz! X3.4

Copyright © 2001-2021, Tencent Cloud.

快速回复 返回顶部 返回列表