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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?4 M# y/ Z* k6 e! W [- ?
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Let's face it' x W! }* M% O/ _
English is a stupid language.
+ J$ h3 ]4 M+ D7 L# _5 F1 s$ V* b1 |There is no egg in the eggplant4 _# U$ B6 Z! q2 i- G7 r6 Y2 L
No ham in the hamburger0 a5 [) L/ o7 c3 ?( _3 J
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
2 C& U# w* h2 m t+ j# @English muffins were not invented in England) U- _; x: R1 l+ |
French fries were not invented in France.
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9 N8 C$ k* A) I2 Y4 ]We sometimes take English for granted
# e J0 y% S- `! x7 R5 \! j, DBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
* L. Q4 r1 X2 l2 vQuicksand takes you down slowly
) Q8 G5 [5 S7 U$ s( L& g6 m5 d* rBoxing rings are square
; U2 S; w. A4 g! m$ B1 oAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 8 f" {% R A* t' |
& }; }' ]5 d/ P5 F3 I1 |+ B( jIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.$ s: x! T9 y* n* z" i% Q# s, v7 @- k
If the plural of tooth is teeth* @8 ^1 `) ~/ y' |
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
$ W# K5 r1 {$ U: EIf the teacher taught, o" H6 q1 K1 t0 x* w. Y
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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$ D9 i N1 N9 ~5 D- P/ M f4 }If a vegetarian eats vegetables) x ]6 U, w3 j9 T* }
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
$ Z0 y8 J2 G+ H5 a. v1 y, J9 ?Why do people recite at a play
6 ~+ x& t/ V9 Y' _4 d7 O4 i4 S# ]3 NYet play at a recital?
: E/ l* g% S, IPark on driveways and8 ?8 ~7 |6 g( R3 u' \' e+ E0 |9 u
Drive on parkways- p$ m. t4 o0 s& f
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy' H# R) U+ d$ _7 A8 C& L4 }
Of a language where a house can burn up as# q3 s0 J% D4 ]& X3 V* x$ S
It burns down4 R- R o ?6 j, {! x2 M4 x
And in which you fill in a form / X/ o& f- B. c1 z6 N& i0 s
By filling it out, p# ]5 I' Z4 Y, w, {
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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( c5 `/ n. X9 L9 n4 bEnglish was invented by people, not computers
" `% \, C$ `( B4 v: i) sAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race* n" [7 z. z/ C: v4 s% |& D5 `8 W
(Which of course isn't a race at all)% I* u0 i7 d: a0 `
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That is why
5 q- f! `' l" | d4 q) {When the stars are out they are visible
- M# w# B. Y" F b+ jBut when the lights are out they are invisible
+ U9 g- W9 V& j* u% fAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch( u v3 ~; G0 u, A1 |
It starts
- ^ m, u3 b% G! DBut when I wind up this observation,8 U+ u( I2 Z* \ G) q
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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