Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:
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1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)

/ R/ f$ b* m! o2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
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. l& R9 j& {5 G1 q2 Y1 F7 v  E3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

; t0 E) s1 J0 U1 X; O& E2 d6 r4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
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5. Are You Andy or Barney?

" x( ~8 i, [& h' X6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
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" C/ F. E5 N3 [% {9 Y3 L6 @+ A* j7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

8. I pay your salary!
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9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!

6 B# o+ F& i% V3 T& j# Y10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.
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, R* D: W" |5 ]* c/ P) L11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.

  L1 P4 x1 b2 _& ]& }& B/ R( D12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"