 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN : % @! V% E! [! a- {8 d* x9 E
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. Z2 `8 P* D3 r1 ^Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.! {$ B9 `( f% T2 `: \- _
8 ~1 f% R/ D8 B2 ?3 \. M$ `Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. `' \2 Q4 r9 S; u! }9 Z% ?% E
! a3 f& r' D4 U/ TIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 3 D+ ]# I! i) x1 n5 b N7 I
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. Y* P8 t/ L7 t" f
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. 1 z, z. G4 v) r0 ?7 O
6 Z5 Z0 x3 ] v$ b1 i: e+ PWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. " ]# A: j8 J( Y. c, x; e1 v
6 N1 {- ]$ s) [" f$ iWash your hair again to make sure it's clean." i# k$ \3 P: N. F
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..+ ^% e3 p2 L5 Y4 G
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ( f4 `% V% t: B4 g5 j8 f
* @9 `: h0 f6 u: G' x5 l6 ?% J8 vWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ! L/ _9 }& \% P* U! a/ D, [
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Rinse conditioner off hair.. ^4 c4 e8 J8 |* H2 W# l
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Shave armpits and legs.2 Y7 }5 X3 |! Z" {2 z
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Turn off shower.
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) f. @9 T& J2 a* L& f( m# U7 ySqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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: }) E# G c1 g% qSpray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 6 I w: E" }* v" F# B i& c& j( h
7 \" j9 Z3 v |% J& d$ N' l3 B4 ^Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. % ?3 G4 z/ x( ~; h$ D. W
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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3 K' d) @; ^% X" R) p. r' ^) WIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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' E3 h e/ w7 U5 C+ \6 IHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 1 r c1 B9 y1 ?* w3 A
# e2 k: t, N: H4 |* LTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 5 n; E+ `' L: `! c: h
1 n5 ^( s2 [& e! Q5 a- \Walk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. . l1 @7 M! V5 ~
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. * l7 [" u$ Y+ Y1 A% ]2 \0 r
1 }3 D5 e! _' G$ RAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. $ v2 D+ }! g4 i: o
V" Q5 _0 p, J/ c( M1 ~Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. * U2 d- D# X! g, @) \/ v
# o# T f( [4 p" Q: EFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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5 x- i' e( e& C( UWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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k1 h1 w# Q1 W; h. z) vPartially dry off.' C) }% ? d. G6 K
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 7 p9 J* r/ V4 M2 k0 e! g @
2 F1 A) F7 ?, Q. D: r# r8 N( T% M2 wAdmire wiener size in mirror again.
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Z f8 ]4 |' M: I, q9 A" @Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 4 I! i5 X8 X/ _! ^
$ u1 D, ]& [+ x5 z3 F' xReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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/ @! z2 \0 G" k' I: O" o9 F+ G6 Y! HThrow wet towel on bed.
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Z( `6 Y; S6 c: C# OIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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