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- f2 f* s( i& \. O6 r/ i. r: G& HWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.- N1 c& u6 S' `% N/ K: ^$ Y) }
2. Mostly to clean the house.
6 U/ T) X% n0 A Q, n v3 t9 o3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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. s( W; U# @! g1 P5 l4 ZHow did God make mothers?
_% L) t' |/ z+ l1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
( L$ @: M- i2 j4 ]; ~ m1 l \2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 6 X' ?6 z' ^' \3 D) e- e% o
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. ! T6 ~6 u z( U; Z& i5 I# T; M1 ]
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
$ @2 _: u V& N+ q$ }: y/ z! x1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 9 S7 W' X% u# K% e y
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. $ ?8 Z# e4 m6 y, G
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? : l! v3 {6 P4 K* f2 K
1. We're related.4 t7 `' ^/ q8 U& }
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 1 G+ ~3 M( f, v1 M
& k/ e: n+ j5 a T( \1 qWhat kind of little girl was your mom? ( X0 Z1 U. s/ h8 `- R8 S
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 0 V/ {1 o. b' O0 R( c
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. + k7 p' ]. ~1 }9 w# {3 ?
3. They say she used to be nice. 7 @! E# U* K: L0 H$ N/ i+ l. l8 ]
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
3 |1 K+ N6 U+ x1. His last name.
' W i5 @/ D. n8 Z2 {( G9 q2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
0 ~0 E6 E1 B8 ^8 P, p3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? & B% p+ l! a2 N! Z
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Why did your mom marry your dad? ) m& R) ^6 m. {2 @0 Q4 d5 a4 Y" D
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. ' D* g" C, e: Q) e+ h( H$ X
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. * R# A/ l- a/ ]" x, D& h
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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! ?, b: z4 q/ A1 cWho's the boss at your house?
# ?+ x4 P+ ]% [2 ?1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
# ], ^ M G/ d; ?2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
7 {* M' e2 |; u9 v9 u3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ! Q3 V* Z( n' i% h5 V
! r0 m; X* J" C: W- |% dWhat's the difference between moms & dads? 1 ^7 |) k: |. |/ o. @4 n4 n7 q
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
% d7 t' m% @+ J9 S6 m2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
( Y( c% J' b6 Z: v3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
1 I0 ~( ^2 s0 K; G4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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$ D6 Q$ O5 V9 n2 uWhat does your mom do in her spare time? & C/ ]7 a2 c9 H5 C# x+ }& `
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
7 k* e* i! T" N- z: ` @# v2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? ) [8 j+ c9 i! B2 x; f- B
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
! R& }, c9 f$ i1 O" j3 H4 _) K2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. / z5 C8 C, ^' L: K* `! @5 U+ |
( A) _1 v$ e% E9 |. [6 \4 zIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 4 |: V" Z) A$ d3 W7 J, A
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. ; ~8 n& T9 i( s
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me. {: ~! A- Z" `
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. 2 S5 E' K1 E+ _% G* L& s7 R
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