 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
( y% l5 r e# o$ K2. Mostly to clean the house. % h8 ^+ d9 U) h5 }- ~" H1 ?; F8 R! y) k
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 0 v+ |# U) V3 B( d
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How did God make mothers?
A: T4 S9 E; T4 x- r% [1 k1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
- ?6 Y) K+ e( A1 s# p) b2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. & @, Z% X. ]. P" s& ]$ L$ k: h C! S1 |
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? $ R5 s' l8 [) n1 N
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
( U6 N1 f: Q0 r# C9 W! S2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. # W- `/ H8 Q: I6 m5 h0 ?
- v1 m: x v' ]Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 4 [% `* H' H+ {7 F# K9 [6 f; v, B3 G( ^
1. We're related.
6 J6 A: r1 F% Y% l; p$ _# ^3 S& D2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. . X0 ~- g* t" h- M" R
8 S' I5 d7 K, Q2 |5 m9 YWhat kind of little girl was your mom? 6 A1 B5 B, m$ m
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. ; [2 h" t' k* P4 s& p
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
1 L! n9 B/ P, i( S) v l5 p3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1 B$ i8 J' c$ `5 H6 U1. His last name.
! [1 l2 a( W6 o: r2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
/ M+ o. z. c6 K; g( W$ |3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? ! L9 t8 S5 N# t
; J- ?' i3 o/ z" w1 LWhy did your mom marry your dad? & G0 ^/ ^5 F9 z+ ?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. . H7 P) A0 q9 j# W: M) ]; q1 K
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
& r/ I, _9 k8 @% U% W6 I7 v( g3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? 5 n( r) ^) K: c% G7 ~, J( W
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
& e( h6 \& X9 W0 W! t6 k! I2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.4 v& D6 V" C& }$ T4 Z
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. + F; y" F l. V# @, S
8 U7 Z3 o6 A3 ~" z7 RWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
4 \4 y; d5 T ?, i ]) {1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. $ j! b6 Z0 x8 T3 f6 Y
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
5 B" C1 B5 I# H0 y7 i1 k3 M3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. % K) n1 D7 I/ y3 @5 W7 J4 I: }, i/ |
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. , N) z; W. i$ ?* B
* n& s; y0 f0 b- i4 [What does your mom do in her spare time?
2 o: B% U( h+ \" b1. Mothers don't do spare time.
8 M. D6 D; v, u' T2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. : g ]) |% O; E0 s! c) ~
' `' j' c% R: ?7 f$ {1 l8 Y; iWhat would it take to make your mom perfect?
A" V0 d6 p8 K. h" P1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.- x- o; D1 M8 X& V+ T
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 1 }8 ]7 }8 I7 o$ _+ N3 \8 F
$ r' o2 Y7 l- \# {+ X, A/ xIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
- S) ?! D+ X1 J4 O1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
4 o7 ^ k# N: R$ P5 G. Z8 ?, y c2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
0 ^4 w* H. \( M7 C! L! ~( Q- f3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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