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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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( |9 t6 h6 t" E' O& s3 N3 k. b7 E; `1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 4 M- T* S6 H2 G) ^
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
5 s/ V+ I+ p8 `2 P$ j$ b3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. 1 T% n! y1 a! f
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. 5 t+ F! Z: L. _1 U
5. Weed
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+ F1 P: Z4 S* e1 D9 ATOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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5 T2 Q! E) i+ f0 @7 o6 @+ H- j* D1. Big rock between you and B.C. 7 X( w& F& f4 m7 z! t( k
2. Ottawa who?
0 f# q- E0 K, p9 f5 e" _- r3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
' Z: t, X# E, @* o' S( [& B4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. ; g: Q8 `. H0 F6 z0 s
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. , ~8 L0 i5 \' F: }4 D3 Q% w
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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8 q" f( s5 q- J: Y1. You never run out of wheat. 9 u7 H/ G4 q8 n/ _: X: ^% N" r
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
' l7 w# o. i' r/ t4 D" C# s( t3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. ( m& N' u; l" e, e; A
4. People will assume you live on a farm. % d$ N' Y, R- w1 _; ?' `1 c
$ e8 j1 w1 o: A/ W( JTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA # F; n( b7 c) j% l5 K1 G7 M
( d5 F/ Y4 t S, ?! a' f- d1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. ; N% v- e) m9 j: y M9 d( ~1 n
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
8 o% b3 D* _7 F) k3 h3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. ( i" g0 D- c+ ]5 t
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
: w( v. b6 r' Y$ W/ y0 D% a1 L5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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0 B$ x# K9 B ^0 ?TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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% A7 i$ i6 L s: a( b" z; Q h+ Z1. You live in the centre of the universe.
1 Z, s; i, N" E5 {2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
1 f. M# K3 f7 X4 P- ^3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 0 r9 F/ _! E2 l7 P8 C5 v9 d6 V8 M
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. ' ]! ?7 R- _2 ]
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC " l8 H1 C) d; Q; B7 H
9 W" `: n# p) l4 C/ e' ~1. Racism is socially acceptable
0 l9 Y5 ? K7 @( c, X2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. . G; U1 ]+ K" X
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. * U2 m! A; {+ j2 M/ R( _; r0 g
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *- e$ c0 w1 d2 b2 {
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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x5 d) T& y3 l" QTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
8 K F: _; |) S: C" O4 S2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
( h9 r; w; c0 t% \5 z3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 1 o* b& Z9 G4 b4 r: e1 d/ N( ^' r2 C# l+ q: q
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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. w8 M7 x6 ]" t' G2 KTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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5 r: ?( s1 `! |! i N0 l2 [1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. . T3 p+ z( v" V
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. ) V" W. o# m+ n# H
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. $ l2 z! c1 i) L1 K4 p
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 2 `, r6 w+ R8 V/ O
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. : G6 x p; e, c
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
! u! [. ^( a$ U) t! r9 [3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
0 b! W+ y- D% M% P) P4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." , V$ @* W* u8 S/ X+ V
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
* ]! x N! ~7 f; ` t% v6 |3 p5 q6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. 5 }$ M" s' V2 P2 X& e! \5 [! T
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND : ^' X, m4 i2 J
8 Y$ Q" A; h, I, N3 c1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. 9 w9 r9 I6 B% ?" g! q
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
# F3 v. {! Z2 J9 C3 u( v3. The workday is about two hours long. - }7 v' o" o p% @6 ^
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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