 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!) n6 e1 X _6 }) ~8 y/ f1 U5 Q+ w
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写9 b5 i; q/ F u P
: ~" }/ H q; N/ A1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.0 |# s' y& P7 g% P L# Q: n# q
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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, c' b3 w, U5 t" C6 D' f1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
0 h* X1 U4 Y8 u' O6 Xdown.
# F2 q+ E* q9 X, [We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ! H# u; }3 {1 d/ C' }2 w
you
' }& m6 L( \$ z7 w4 P' Aleaving it down.% Y- @ j, i: w% U) L
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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4 u b; E- S& J8 ?, X( S0 _1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
) D0 A- }3 _. G" [$ t) xLet it be.
) o, ~9 M& Q: h; Y j1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去8 a+ n! F4 ?3 E3 @ R0 O
3 }, e# B$ c7 q+ P1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
: Z9 P3 O; J/ athat way.
8 X! V% c9 C) c: s6 Y1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.) ]6 k! b; z! z6 l6 I M
1，哭泣是敲诈
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* e, J/ V* f$ X1. Ask for what you want.: `2 o+ {% C$ o- S- e3 z i
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!: Q/ j+ x7 y3 F; g9 M. k
Strong hints do not work!7 t4 d* {. K/ C+ x5 M
Obvious hints do not work!/ b |, z6 n3 S! w6 w# U5 J
Just say it!
/ J# T$ B; m" n8 v; D8 ^3 H1，你想要什么就说7 N3 y4 V/ R: Y; J1 N
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！& p# o# [5 l2 ?5 T0 p) I
8 i1 A' O/ O) f" |# n, K1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every $ P. V( j2 k8 A3 }7 V
question.
, i3 s+ v$ f% j6 t% ^0 ~/ r1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）5 R( k9 W/ P4 `' x+ t0 L: X: g
' u- r; Y. S1 n" V, T1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
4 A( w( y8 \3 jwhat we do.
, j( ~; S& m$ T. I* j. NSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5 ?+ \) r& X' M# _8 S6 ]1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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0 T. X; Y0 x. N Y8 S# c. V2 R1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
2 N8 @) z) B" w2 ~; _! L5 h1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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8 w# Z: O) D/ u1 K9 P- R' d1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.1 q" c- K8 }+ \
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.$ q6 c& o5 f4 {2 Z
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us# x* B! x+ C3 I0 N6 c2 l
to act like soap opera guys.! W1 O0 {, @' P M0 Y
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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8 u3 G8 w; ^& K; p1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.9 [# s( p0 z1 |# a! ]7 A5 _
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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- O Y' k3 Y0 _& ?1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways7 f) c: g) `( E# Z8 _8 n @/ {" o
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.. Z* w- F+ `5 b
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。; j, M3 ~- o; @2 A, L+ Z$ m- `6 |7 p
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）4 w/ ^6 M0 _$ }) G, F+ O
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
% S! p' a$ C7 Cdone. Not both.
. b' z1 ^8 I T7 h9 x+ X$ O @If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- {5 z: Y2 w- r% [
commercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we., E1 j- e8 Q7 t8 c
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.: p/ n) \* ~+ E- K* b+ M
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.! D7 A- |) s2 V' {
We have no idea what mauve is.
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4 Z) D y, y/ B/ |$ G$ N% b! C1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.5 s$ p) h& @, ^$ u+ Q/ m" ?$ K
& r+ q) F( N `( g$ z& |8 S; X1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
5 s/ G5 X# }7 x$ K4 t! Mnothing's wrong.% S" o0 s" G# w- [$ a
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer3 R' q4 l+ w. W
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is5 [4 Z6 z2 r2 E% h0 z
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
/ R' r! W# }7 p# vdiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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+ i) ~, s s+ f1 V# X: E1. You have enough clothes.
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7 g3 I p, ^' u1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!5 |4 N2 O# O& x/ [3 |/ h/ _& ^
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1. Thank you for reading this., h4 r( \/ n, L% ^
% P+ C& Z+ H4 D8 e+ fYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;/ a$ I6 V; z+ Q" x2 b+ g3 v
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.8 _4 m8 X z0 }
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh./ q$ ^: `8 c* Z8 j( g2 C# [) V Y
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
