 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
1 C, `1 \# @' A请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写8 C! a" {$ q2 B4 R" C8 z- M
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
7 ]+ t0 L- e- u8 s1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫2 f$ N/ U* F0 }5 B+ E1 B s
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it) d7 h6 @! I" E f) x# Q
down.' y3 I ]5 [& e
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 4 E. \5 ^" P9 A- K4 _
you
2 x" O4 ?3 e r( O Y9 Y! b' g8 L! ]leaving it down.
' }0 B1 f/ ~- s- i1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.1 t2 |, c7 E! \, G+ ]. `
Let it be.
/ a+ ~3 q8 f4 [/ h+ j5 @6 r) t1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去$ f& g( s: f& H3 M5 h
: }: l! u% V/ c5 P4 u& M, A- G8 L1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
7 G6 Y0 I" v# K \% athat way.
# f& P) {- y' R5 L5 v1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！* A# I' b0 n6 y4 a( A. F
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1. Crying is blackmail.
2 ~! B; Y! Z2 }2 X" b5 C D$ G1，哭泣是敲诈
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3 [) v' c5 t( E' |1. Ask for what you want.
# \: h, a- n z8 ], n5 ^3 WLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
/ C8 E! b) k& y" Z( FStrong hints do not work!
' d5 J x6 `0 KObvious hints do not work!
$ p2 G+ A, |9 i6 l# d* p( {1 Q& qJust say it!: P- C0 _6 E( r2 n9 d! I! Z
1，你想要什么就说
9 C' L7 S2 B- L6 U& }我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！& @1 V, r7 h Z% U
' j8 V W% |3 q" H3 |1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
$ K& j1 G; v1 c4 B# ^+ A) }question.$ _5 y1 A, T7 x
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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- e7 B) I! o7 Q1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's3 i8 P2 Q/ T# ^( f- x
what we do." z- d$ p0 U* l) p0 P. e
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.# B* u2 Y7 ~5 v9 w4 u2 O
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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6 I1 g# T' {/ O6 V7 F1 ~. U, a# \1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.$ e2 l& ]5 h. Z: E& N9 D
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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' f1 [* S i( [; a4 y0 g( F. c( z1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.4 a, M! f" j m! S0 X1 T: z
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
# ]1 @& K/ X ~/ q: u6 V' ~9 h我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
0 f. H0 K& D) V; k* n! k& l( bto act like soap opera guys.
. P2 \8 }% t! N" a( {( _1 Y1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们; T8 k- I7 o/ R
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.( N0 G6 c4 n! C: |1 A: c$ G+ Q9 _
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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5 D" S+ q" E4 q ^4 n) a( B+ q1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
& h# f ?0 \- K4 v0 {makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
% }3 p5 S9 J. g1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。. r6 Z) h* s4 q0 q& B
- I/ c3 Y- L1 J! m% f（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
7 t* T9 V5 b- G4 W1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it$ O! Z+ k0 C0 j8 T2 w( D
done. Not both.
5 R6 Z9 y& Y' O' ?7 A" A2 w1 y% iIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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2 Z/ m; `* u T7 H+ X1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.' D7 V7 _# k4 u9 c- L
( Q* ^" w( R9 R' K3 y1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.# z+ ]# H; U) J9 Z3 C8 _! u: s
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.) W: Q6 |6 P$ m
We have no idea what mauve is.
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/ ?3 c& O3 k8 D! B( P+ ?+ b/ n; e1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
# P9 ~1 d6 ]* D- E3 h( W2 \, P" d \nothing's wrong." F6 m2 m9 O3 F. F/ Y$ ]
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1 {- w4 a, l2 K8 x ^9 r( I1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer' a" b3 f e( H0 B! m
you don't want to hear.
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# F, J' d# D- b6 }3 E1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is, E3 L; z2 D5 g' g3 }4 h
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to5 L+ K5 q5 N. X1 h6 y
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.. S6 v0 t4 a# o) G: p
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1. You have enough clothes.
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5 s0 O1 V5 ]/ ]7 A. Q1. You have too many shoes.6 u+ ]4 G ?1 C# S6 C
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!2 s! N) g6 P% I9 z/ k" f
# p9 @* c5 k) g/ ^+ N1 N. ~% ]& E" A1. Thank you for reading this.4 u* |/ K0 \5 `- ?2 G% r' m
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
: |3 v" H, E6 [4 eBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.' v6 ?# k) @/ u9 s. k8 @
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
