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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!/ k" g% n' K1 X  `# I
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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; W( n% g. c6 }9 G1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
; c- |  Z9 V( Y- Y* ?6 ^# O1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it( s% Z5 t6 }* s9 u" r% e- s
down.  B+ Q6 B3 s) p& t
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 5 `& {  ]4 L. h9 |
you3 P2 p: C9 v+ N% J+ }% d
leaving it down.# A; N+ S3 |! o- G/ j
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?! A& t8 ^3 U: o0 c

7 D% D- r8 ]! [5 {, Z1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
2 Q" B" D' ]8 ~/ F% J5 h7 XLet it be./ R  U5 I2 C6 C1 O# W1 E
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去9 j+ D5 \% e! p$ T" e, D7 E
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
; ?8 z' K* P& U( R: m" q0 [that way.9 I, Z( h) N, R  g8 o" X& T$ v, ~: t
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
9 }$ k( N! C, N. Q5 n" s% \
: K) V0 ]2 w* m  H! d1. Crying is blackmail.6 A0 m1 p7 K" r$ R, v" ?6 j4 h8 j
1,哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.
. z5 @1 o7 X5 T2 HLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!  N; U" u; r4 e+ W5 M/ _
Strong hints do not work!
% i+ D& `* Y% ?% D5 q& |. OObvious hints do not work!5 M3 Z" M+ ^) H# q- Y" P
Just say it!
' g; @, B1 N* `0 G7 i0 I( `( s7 d1,你想要什么就说
0 ~" h5 U0 ?3 S( ]我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
  r7 x8 d: Q: O9 F! `" N) [- d5 m
  [4 g- d$ p* C1 u( i. J- w1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
* H! h% _# G% S1 m4 F1 i/ q, K/ kquestion.! ?9 s5 Y, f1 }( R* p
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's
/ t/ |0 C! D% E* l7 p& Dwhat we do.: |* {* G0 y5 @
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.% B  S( b- P0 Z6 ~
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。/ V) r1 w  o) |
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.8 _& F) p, z% c
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去3 c& R/ l# B+ P
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.: q2 H# A- J( J1 c* g2 {! R- w
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
7 Z8 Y& H7 D7 L5 D% b7 f/ K% e8 Q我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了
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7 s$ w  n# w' D' J9 x1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
4 g, F% O3 r( mto act like soap opera guys.) ]8 p3 C2 C9 U, {2 N2 r: H
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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3 i+ B9 [& [/ w9 o2 B1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
4 _  h  S0 j, Q, C9 {1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们+ o- a  `5 G' b/ T0 n" w) [9 \
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
* }# [" a) n; Y+ c; n7 Jmakes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.2 l# P8 l4 X( m. `5 f& g) T6 p
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。  t% s: j5 u0 q/ @- J

, M3 d4 U; V. u: w(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
! B6 c& |1 O% t* ]8 m" l1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it. e# B0 N5 p4 c/ o) P- b
done. Not both.
1 `' _( p2 ^6 g7 J; EIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.+ [3 w8 b) F1 T/ S1 Z

  N. h% l% \4 s9 H* p( }" \1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
/ [3 j. ~: l$ Y' Ecommercials.
" v: N  N. M$ Z$ C8 n4 Y3 K8 G* X9 A9 v7 ]$ B* n: _/ J, k
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.$ q6 a" L% K1 C! G- x0 Z
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
3 f7 c3 Y. Q# m2 v! X1 b, P& G; ?Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.; i7 K6 P7 L! |$ k' {% l9 D- I
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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, y# _( ~9 Y! ]  v9 X1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
2 O0 i3 O* \, d& Lnothing's wrong.
( ?: U1 t7 ^; S( p9 b0 zWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.& R- L0 s9 n7 l% x, p
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer  Z: c$ y" o. Z  G7 B% b: Y4 V" k
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
  W# }* \1 W8 P% L  Rfine...Really.) g+ d# ^, V$ T! q

5 p3 y* q% x% J/ i) w1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to( `9 B2 |$ C. B/ }
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.  x3 q1 M! q' {$ Q1 ^
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1. You have enough clothes.
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( c) R0 ?5 K$ `% H( ~+ D* z7 {1. You have too many shoes.! R0 b$ o! ^- Q+ r5 _# g/ ^

9 ?6 b1 d8 @9 ?4 F1 V7 L0 I( k1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!/ k1 A, U# n' G9 e/ p' J
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1. Thank you for reading this.8 }( T, K4 X6 Z- ~! f! c
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;" `2 y$ C9 x6 U1 u8 D" [
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.. H3 i# A/ L! Z, A

7 v3 j# p0 D: t; j9 ?  YPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.( {1 k1 g) w$ Q7 ?6 B2 g# @4 }
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。
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1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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( i, s' J, h& {! f1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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0 E: _" i1 @1 d" Z9 T, y1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.% F9 g1 I# j2 G) x, k
我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.0 r' u1 m6 N* d2 F
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.5 m' T4 `& M& z1 K% v6 F6 M
如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。5 S7 f! `- B! Q+ L/ M6 G

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. f) C& ?0 u3 M, K6 f/ ~  N, V1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
8 ]9 i9 y; M. S( }$ m6 h# Z如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。) r# o$ d& T% l' v* I8 F( @% u1 s: a

6 m: Y! O2 i$ O6 w2 ?# X. J4 ^
: d2 \' f0 ^8 |" L% h1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.
: v6 C2 M  ~" P- r) J如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:) p, f; ^  Z3 b5 {) n$ o* {+ `
ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.) X  R" g  v7 j/ q9 R) m5 m" `6 v
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。/ e9 }# U2 }* A- o  o& }) o; R' T/ r
) ?% z/ g# c) N4 s0 ?
这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置; l# v9 j/ k" N  `
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
大型搬家
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.' [* t2 W0 x, a# ?: L( f
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你8 L4 Z# Z2 n: B' ~

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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.! ]8 ]; z4 |5 I- x  V
不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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1. You have enough clothes." R/ G3 g$ c5 R, w' s8 H
你的衣服足够多了; U  T7 ~* {3 b

, a# s' f" M# _" N  n% z1. You have too many shoes.
! t' l4 g. R: U0 }你的鞋子也太多了吧
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/ O; w% U" M3 p4 I1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!! F: N7 v' }8 ~( O3 \. N% }
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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& l' a5 g' a8 i4 C8 z. G# H+ {1. Thank you for reading this.! k' \, R6 Y% _/ _+ b8 f' j
多谢你能看完这个: W* j( {6 V7 P

; [( G; L& p! A- }' ]  H2 b8 N8 v" i" t' BYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.: U1 ]+ |# W6 k( z! n
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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3 l8 l9 h  M; t8 x还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!

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应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿9 \# N: G4 J' t; C

3 ?4 c; P5 h) c玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:
% V. l3 I  g/ v0 k3 X7 K" S3 {1. You have enough clothes.
' ^+ X; `+ k% O+ G$ n你的衣服足够多了
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$ P; e. S# T( h1. You have too many shoes.. |/ g2 ^5 F0 R1 `0 k
你的鞋子也太多了吧

5 D' g# B9 U7 F. r3 f% F% a) b1 e! L8 R这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
2 L. _4 w+ m4 `4 k; E& Z9 I2 o- J  `! N1 ~- O5 H' i$ f
----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.
: F8 ~9 t! b. kLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
; z  m0 R9 f# Z' h1 l, qStrong hints do not work!
( w0 ^/ Q* A; @# k5 LObvious hints do not work!
6 J" Y$ y  d$ r' xJust say it!! X0 g+ |/ O" g3 d8 S0 q+ s
1,你想要什么就说
7 {' t. D- J. \& R$ E* @9 z7 M- @我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!, Y/ }5 _7 R  K

! C1 ]' b4 `0 B关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:
6 Z, i4 L3 ^- g5 F8 Y* Y' s' N1. Ask for what you want.4 Y) x5 I6 Q9 \! |
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
  Y( a- v0 x  L5 A, t' m/ P% iStrong hints do not work!4 A$ u( `3 f! }* V+ ?& y  c7 [/ B" ?3 n
Obvious hints do not work!! `8 W, |" t. b; w2 f, }
Just say it!
" \( q, n4 {0 c# l1 L1,你想要什么就说9 W8 l: G1 ?+ p4 _3 h0 p
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...
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( U7 g( \% `$ b8 }  f3 T+ K  q瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
" S& s( ^1 n$ N6 U% q4 Q被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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8 b7 D6 I9 f4 U8 ?6 ^2 U! O咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:5 K$ G" J' Y* `) o5 Z, u# _
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/ r1 i% ?3 i, w3 @2 J, v咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿+ x0 V# ]( J/ I

9 B( t- R! O7 Q2 E( A, Ohttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。
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4 v+ Q$ K5 z( {还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:( Q* r  d. b$ x7 u! }% L9 g

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7 d* O3 t9 ~- [1 _& q4 @$ [这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。+ W1 l$ I' h+ A6 y* S
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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体会?- {! j' v; h; t0 L
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