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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:8 v; o4 n0 P% s# B; R+ R, P
8 N! F) ]& i/ X1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.4 c# m$ m6 E0 C b7 L K9 ]) {
d" B& Q# E- `0 G! I. t7 X2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush: v/ s6 `6 r8 ^( E: B* S
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
$ |2 F8 F: b" a! _+ ]morning.& k# L5 _# e1 {7 |
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,7 S- z: a; f0 _6 n
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a6 `$ q1 ?, P8 H8 T
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'., u/ d; m8 Y0 M0 e' B* W
3 G K1 a* s; A, d/ s" k4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its8 @- K+ c6 O9 `8 q
own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
0 f" c: ~6 ~* Y7 smuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires' {% a8 D7 W1 t/ I
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell( {8 ]) U5 n( ?) d2 |$ f/ Y: C$ ?
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.4 l/ |2 r3 I" _& v1 K& R- @) l
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
9 r r' U t! P$ m9 W$ bcussed out, and possibly shot.# n- p9 G7 R5 O
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can! e. x/ O/ {2 t0 A
get you shot.
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
% R- j. g. f, i& f& |9 f3 ?has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at `+ A8 p% i! J; k) {+ C
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot3 B0 q$ i7 O- F2 [" S
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first# r+ I* }$ R6 S! M$ { a
vehicle through the intersection.) ^# C: r5 _1 Q6 z/ V
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour: N1 H V0 c+ I: y& t) y9 y" J
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next
& Y! m( O, M+ fday's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and0 @9 K" l$ G+ G6 F
more construction starts everyday.
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7 m2 b J% _4 N( y N* u3 t; `9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
4 ]7 t# h7 c' _( N. Qdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,* `$ j# N; ^0 M+ @% I0 L0 a
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
x* [) P3 X" p$ K% P& @3 R7 Mroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye" {7 Z4 l) e" F2 d7 {
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
+ Y2 [- `% p- a# B3 m66 Street are also the same road; got it?6 D l3 D5 m0 J5 f5 p8 Z
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
; ~, U8 c# f' i$ ^8 A( c+ _shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
$ l0 v7 D& ?& w, v, e# a; j3 \Activated.'
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! i/ B. K/ Q, Z" q$ _12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,4 V3 }; K$ m9 p. ]# [, p
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'7 n0 z" ~: o8 _; @
accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
/ }9 H! E; P6 s( n3 _' \) C( Llined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and# a" \# l0 L6 G- I8 D5 M& a! q
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
