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Tiger s Holiday Poem J8 N3 N% k2 \/ P
! Q9 V- _# x' _' r- _6 U. TTwas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house& q+ |( U5 v) ?, h8 h" O% [
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
/ t1 t; `# p0 A2 E, o8 r' ]% B" bShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,7 ~+ n, w* ]0 o" s
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.
( ^3 i" Q4 X$ F6 N, [He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.# M7 g7 s, A0 z$ j
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.. R& B0 f5 L, ~6 a5 s
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
8 b: j4 s# ]7 E vWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.: e l: R3 f) @! f1 D
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,6 ~4 e+ ^- Y9 C& p1 A
Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.8 L/ H1 {# F! i4 J
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,* |" ^+ {: [' C# i1 r8 S5 c
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
: F; @0 j; h& y* _% t- F$ tDespite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',* I! u3 ]4 s6 H1 h- c
Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .5 h) V4 N0 ~$ j7 E4 E# J
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
& b- Y6 a7 ?1 f: T4 J"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
8 C4 E) P; S' l: ^! Q- eShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,( n. O, _1 n) Q1 w" Y
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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