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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.3 ~1 g' J5 Z) I* p# V
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I love words. I thank you for hearing my words." E+ O' I5 @5 O% ?$ `( C
I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.
$ }0 V+ B# u. t2 hThey're my work, they're my play, they're my passion." Z# L% {1 S$ S% M# J: i
Words are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
. V5 X" V* O8 D; V* M7 M: A8 fthen we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for' E1 j" w# G4 F& ]. S! u
that thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same
O& B0 I; s6 t# w4 bwords that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
. D) @* n7 k3 [ {+ o5 HThere are some people that are not into all the words.2 s$ a. a: k3 E e* m" c
There are some that would have you not use certain words. U, J) y1 c; u! v6 j
There are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 70 E2 p9 X8 Z7 I g' K9 ?% ^+ ]+ ]
of them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
6 V" Q% `% ` O, [) D399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous9 n0 L6 H/ N& Z9 v& c
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,
3 q1 C* g& `: L! R4 _1 _Bad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
; m9 E% h5 N$ D! j* Y& _"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,
8 O9 x& |6 Z ]/ m) N2 I2 m/ uand words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?( |3 i/ u) H% Q2 b
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"/ s7 m* U0 C4 k; M1 N+ c2 o
Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,
5 g$ _& W6 ~+ p7 I) Pcurve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.
" L! M8 s$ {0 J: ]"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"/ }4 l0 Z: r# A5 w( I7 r
Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly& I- t% m9 _0 p& T1 ]
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,5 V, S0 @6 @( k l8 u6 H% z
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a
$ k( S1 V) A2 K+ B8 Msnack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist( f) W1 R' j x" ~& s6 t
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,
7 q/ m- U* ~& A# z7 X+ s' N HPizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just: b# J/ i# ]/ _
One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does
- m' h, K- C3 inot belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,
9 P+ f2 X, f& C: d6 A& u6 C* h; vbut you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not6 e* ^4 g8 T, V% s6 n2 Y
completely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why2 K7 R. j! K- D
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
; f5 ]3 A- ~- _& |MotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on2 | e# A" g" u4 ]+ M
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.4 y& V* o$ s' s0 \( P7 l" Z1 m
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
$ \/ j% @, i2 v1 Hwith. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at- o8 c: G0 Q, Z# A5 m+ Z
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
8 N7 H' b* \/ q% f0 p# QIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the4 u/ N" ]( q* r. F, V B: G
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go7 n, N# ?; p0 e
together of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that$ r. u8 t% V: d9 D
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were
" P. W4 | I1 t& w. }6 G7 g# Pcertain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I* \$ s. Y: O% T% j1 a) K! x' V
don't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such
6 b% p E# p( X/ L9 jstupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."6 a' ?1 `- R; F8 |$ y
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more6 g( {8 L& `* L8 n, j1 s9 X' L
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think
6 h1 h+ v$ p p+ v7 E, jit takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very4 {* A! R/ @1 `! V
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to& b* U9 |/ C0 u' I; H
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
( h, C9 h8 {0 }, q% W; B"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love1 o, o' X0 [ d( _+ q% z H
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is. k7 K7 R9 t- k# B# G3 Q
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
4 I" s" Q; O. v( RI like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for8 ^$ F3 q; Y7 C3 w7 }8 @# \6 i6 T
the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,- q# O6 E: P8 Q5 g( @0 B& _
Sherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."
3 f: N* n. _& eSo maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.4 H! W# s. N: Y, g* B
I hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
# w7 K& q+ }( V' w! _4 I6 rcircumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even
b& n$ g# y( |- uclinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,6 D, t. v' _$ Q1 d& t8 }; Q
and Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.
: L8 @6 E7 E. d4 T& X4 u7 O: l8 N) jBut there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.) f* x5 ]1 Z; i* f1 \1 @
Remember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
, ~6 I5 A+ ^ ^- aCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in& u: h- [. h: P( B# a' J0 R$ z( P
the bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for, `+ E8 |) |& w/ p# Q: [* o* U1 Q
Kirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't3 j/ T4 S& z9 A% ^
say "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding' a. u$ L0 S3 F9 W& T4 B$ z, ^
them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
) p' M) {2 s& f. e9 Z+ kgoes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You) X- s9 Z0 p4 w9 U2 y
can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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