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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it., {. l/ J$ g4 G* Q$ v
3 G( L# q9 x5 L7 @I love words. I thank you for hearing my words.
: o! a9 v& E. mI want to tell you something about words that I think is important., y. S# R7 `1 E n. F
They're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.; q& [( v) Q* j5 l" T3 W
Words are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
5 ~8 R7 |! C6 N3 Ethen we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for- c6 `) F) \" i% v, [
that thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same
- a3 @2 O3 J1 v6 Gwords that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
1 I! O) ^, M9 E! Z+ XThere are some people that are not into all the words./ C9 s* V8 U/ E( U
There are some that would have you not use certain words.
: R: p W8 c H* ?9 wThere are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7! B' c. h# C& g1 W) e; y
of them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
+ e5 @0 h$ e* H# q: c399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous, |' [, m% Z, b6 a
to be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,
; _- k _2 J1 S* `! g2 IBad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?
* o8 a+ ?9 _+ J; K' d: ]4 V"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,
. U0 z i# [2 m. I9 w7 t7 Pand words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
# m1 a& }9 B/ o h e0 K"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
4 I( H% _! m5 nThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul,: K# R0 L% i0 ^/ e: P
curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.
) x1 q6 q e. q3 u"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
( ]! F8 e T. M( j! \Wow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly
' w6 S& T3 C, O# Usounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,
g3 u" a, k* G8 }9 t U* u( }man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a# a, l9 E8 S/ Q* W3 ]8 a5 t
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist6 {0 W! P6 s* }1 M
snack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,2 I& Z4 }; S; V8 ^
Pizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just
; x1 s) [, S2 U" ?6 a' f# }One." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does [: y' P; B0 u% t8 w( Z3 y
not belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,' _: H; R' t( l! J5 @* e
but you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
, h( ], P& t' f; f( X$ F+ t* K* icompletely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why: Z+ M& t% C; s8 T; O) K5 Z
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
9 f. d/ r. O$ gMotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on: o6 U5 P" L/ N. z* }; T
there. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.! ^: I( G2 g/ f, c4 G# r
I mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend' `% L0 k" }1 ^6 y2 b, C/ O
with. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at
9 r: T1 k" k: K% k- Ayou like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
+ ]/ Z V r# [0 QIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the
5 ~" Y1 |; G4 U4 x s* |2 }; P# Jother 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go$ z" @( D1 W4 ]( S4 _
together of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that9 E: T5 N: b$ w, O7 {( _+ f# X. c v6 `
Piss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were2 g8 ?& I, ]$ O1 d: c0 a& r
certain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I" E3 k+ G) I( A9 E
don't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such
3 j) X( y2 \# @stupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."
0 h) E1 e2 I% t) E7 ^) E3 ]" oAnd, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more: c$ Y& _0 G9 Z* T. W, L3 i- q' k
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think
6 ]8 w Z4 C3 S( R) rit takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very* B& V* _5 u6 H
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to: G) _, H+ h: z+ h' M) {" N
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,
; ]5 H0 y: A; N9 N" q% F6 I7 g"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love8 u8 N5 c& y: r: _% j/ v
than 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is. k6 Z* K5 D8 K
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but }# d( t8 e, M% G
I like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for" Q3 E+ I' j* R& \
the word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,
, k/ q2 e# X+ m9 I" DSherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."# x5 v" u' Y7 Y7 v! `, v7 @. f7 i% `4 y
So maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.1 \& T4 [1 s0 a5 \( e# V% i- a5 E
I hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any
6 j5 K' R9 B' o/ K& R% y+ Q1 O7 m1 jcircumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even
9 W' Z9 x- i- h& Xclinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,; m7 G4 _6 b: s- t2 R) X
and Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out. t. X/ U I" j- N$ d6 E% l$ G1 Q
But there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.
6 @! d7 B' i" L2 T7 [/ KRemember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock3 v. t& q0 M" Y5 e/ F7 c9 {
CROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
5 K, \* F8 S+ G8 Athe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for
+ Z6 y( g' C! x3 kKirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't: u/ o6 P+ r" Y0 B
say "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding
: Y& L; d' X- b; ^them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
; p4 [9 G' C6 G+ }7 C+ R# A: O8 Z wgoes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You# v2 O; _& c9 i" [
can prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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