 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.6 P( D: |7 S! i# V l
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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* ^4 b9 `: c. ?9 ]# t1 w* o7 |I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:/ s# N! ^- j+ w) g8 r
- x) i. d0 v" X0 S( R% @; y"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 T1 L- r/ C$ F. M% v
- d; C4 @, C! W' C( pI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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And the second one was:; T$ P- \& _! U! L U
4 E. S& Z% P2 E! Z4 Y1 S"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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' n- P/ X) P" g. W" a"What is Roe vs. Wade?"' J: \6 Y& i+ N
9 R5 t( l1 {; d6 M! ]/ AI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?9 t' W! j5 n6 s! i% E; J
3 R; ?/ x, ?. pI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!# l4 }6 J9 E& A5 M4 T9 h6 h
; Y9 z& ?/ o! c) ^I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."' r0 o9 y* Z8 ^% H$ ^
7 U7 o f% U& h3 x7 C) o. kSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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. P8 C6 H* D8 V0 w7 X6 ?: dThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.; J* X- U3 X6 J+ B' t0 t$ F
, J I5 n* ^5 \. y; ? y+ XThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:' i+ c6 W0 x4 J4 x) P
7 S: S- q- I5 s8 \8 k3 L8 {1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.6 I5 b) C; e' K; e$ R0 g0 m& f
. K) P- B1 z2 k0 F2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.- b" k) T B6 G+ z# ]
8 G7 O" L: d1 ~4 E2 E+ K"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.: a: R% S$ s* m K1 w
5 s1 d1 t9 N2 g: B+ K$ VJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".2 C8 @' Q5 G$ ?' s
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.$ @/ o( g! T& G+ ^2 m6 F6 a/ s- D
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
