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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.1 r9 X- Q$ n2 [9 n9 T+ D/ F
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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0 _7 j# `# ^" v* S5 UI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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& x3 P: l! f7 X" S8 t7 q# @And the second one was:
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?( ?$ ]& s) d+ J
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"& ~$ ^! P! T9 T

8 E; n! [$ c, U+ O. ^1 C9 CI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?1 {& K) r- ^  E! J% i0 `- f
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!# V. j5 h$ m) J  R9 L* M3 Z
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."8 i, Q1 @$ r* s; O5 B

" F+ v; G1 `; Z  f# A; B: j1 aSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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: d3 K* s$ w- jNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”7 F- C. B5 e5 g9 K3 A- r* I

- H# o' p4 j0 Y! l$ qThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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$ h, W- d* Z/ S  C; B+ J7 `( k' ZThank you very much!! x; y( u7 f" N1 P
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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: A, L  @& N* r4 p) `4 |, r8 |1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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5 {7 p: D) N7 S& a8 ?& K"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.6 m; Y0 o# ~9 Z! P, r
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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0 f0 v; C" q3 N; sRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.1 a* K- g; h0 Z# X7 q0 A
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
4 Z" K) g8 D: E% ea young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
2 C# k# C- y: X9 `: {怎么理解?
) B. @- y4 c# P50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。
, q0 w) |" j8 J- S5 R怎么理解?6 \) e  t6 h7 a" E2 |. g
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
! A* w  l3 Y( n) Ecyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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6 A/ @) L: H% s; F我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
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- ?: L# w3 s+ Q* |; Y我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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