 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.2 w0 o% x# G5 |# M0 j
1 V$ n+ d( e# v) mI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.
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& q S( {9 q$ p0 b9 j3 {$ s9 l& }I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.6 \' l. w9 I" d" \5 _
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:/ A1 f* ?1 O3 Q8 }) d
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?$ E. T$ i$ b* `' X6 p" A5 G) V9 f% l
, T0 q: h: ~( l# `% N( z' |: l- o) v fAnd the second one was:" G2 ]0 D. x8 `
" o; l0 {' x: h/ G"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?# i' w6 n" t1 Z7 P! M: f2 A/ f* g
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"% z% u" }& z+ S! e0 u/ `4 ~
( A- D1 G3 Z) o* b( rI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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3 Z) h/ K8 j! q7 M: A& a9 ^4 t% nI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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- o5 C2 L9 Y+ j. PSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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. R7 z) Y4 O8 e% u" ZNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”$ ]5 p' I, v7 r6 [/ u: P3 n5 t
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This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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, s" L9 J1 j: b) E k1 j9 BImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:* ], ]9 U; T* L& \; Q
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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& f+ Q/ Z; \* i2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.$ M: p& t C8 y4 z: b: n
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.6 Z2 R9 j$ X! f( `( ^* H# _
, A/ {' P, m0 o- HJoe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
