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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol3 b9 i5 b* h/ L, {8 m
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
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0 K; {+ g4 x6 N: N1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.
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6 r' V) k W+ \; M) N, y2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.) v+ c1 `* N1 V1 n! W
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.% z: b- s+ ]; R2 k) @& i
- J [! p E! t7 S4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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. \$ P9 C* `1 V5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.7 X: z0 u( ~+ x% I; Z e* Y
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6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area6 s. K* U3 {' m+ {# v5 A; ^% N1 _
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
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, g4 n4 ?% O& e# s! R8 `8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask8 n* w4 I" J* L5 o
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'/ [; i9 y5 H- c3 @# U3 M: s
) a% @/ b7 I: z8 D9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.$ B$ z* K* r. Z- w
: t* P) S; K" J) Y& [: ?10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.
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d( D/ y$ D; G! b) e( i' ^11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.) i ?! Y; L0 `& }/ D4 B! k
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels., R0 ^9 r- H; T6 S# F( J. }' Y
- K9 Q) } m; ~- L13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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6 t4 d6 ~5 U& v0 |$ K2 ~- X$ z% m14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!2 Q0 ?- ]* y6 c6 q0 \
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And; last, but not least!)
$ f' R) p4 ~, c% E2 {, e/ W15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
