English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
$ S/ C. w( s0 H5 x2 u8 T; w
Let's face it
% V  Q' {+ K; CEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
: ^- E5 y: T# `: x) ~$ R! U; WAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
9 p$ f  ^4 ~! j! U! L5 ZEnglish muffins were not invented in England
( l% K* Y3 P5 q# L/ j3 D# J& g% mFrench fries were not invented in France.

) Z, J' c: ]- w( KWe sometimes take English for granted
$ O) t/ K2 j0 x4 ?$ NBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
2 n* ~9 S/ ]- ]- Y2 ~Quicksand takes you down slowly
. D' u7 z) a8 l$ L- p5 J) BBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

% q- ^& g- p- U; cIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( I$ I, M* r  ^5 H. n% BIf the plural of tooth is teeth
9 Y/ `. X: ~( h$ d8 Z& @, }Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
; `% W8 k( i3 J6 WIf the teacher taught,
) j+ M- Z' z) H& i) w) d1 ^Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
4 @# R) N; e- R- AWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
. U' \$ h; D" `8 s  K+ Z( a3 T* RDrive on parkways

4 ~2 S+ `  j9 n+ v8 Z0 eYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
7 h; k$ E- M$ iIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
, h+ x8 _+ v' @5 M4 r+ L2 xAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
+ W! @7 d* ~1 R7 K& c) c: vAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
' A, z, ]% L' [(Which of course isn't a race at all)

9 |; B' V" P" nThat is why
' N; s0 E% s; [: f5 nWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
1 t( V8 Q( k' ~/ ZAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
" ~; |  x; `* Z1 rBut when I wind up this observation,
( b  q4 c1 _) {It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
0 e6 \$ D2 U* r* P' y, p# S" B2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
9 b, a/ T+ L6 B& R+ J+ t# ?" }3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
! d/ \) a. |; ~/ A: d0 e# G4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
6 T( P% R) |- B& U1 j我看了几行,就看不下去了.
4 _, z. U6 k+ p8 l  \1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

$ Z- g( j% a" G/ W# x  t% T1 k
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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