English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
' n/ g$ G  g! t2 N( K1 h
Let's face it
$ P0 b$ A1 e& y# m# ?/ [* ^English is a stupid language.
/ B/ A* C- K& E) W# E0 JThere is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
4 c& {8 ~6 X2 s) U3 @# JEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
- O& a' Y/ @) l+ E& q: j3 Y1 y
# m( X! Z' V+ k: [( o$ ~We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
7 n9 N4 h% W- X. Y7 aQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

7 u& g' D# Y( y" y, I% hIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
* C" G+ O) P9 E5 `: R* n2 OIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
$ A# n1 T  c/ }) C/ t& q% pWhy didn't the preacher praught.
3 J# H0 ^) `7 x# L3 y
6 }$ M# E7 z2 Y, A1 l- {If a vegetarian eats vegetables
, T8 Y( v$ r; v9 Y. _- y9 _+ EWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
( B3 S3 K: z. K" CDrive on parkways
& z9 h4 l2 y* `2 y; s1 D
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
7 D$ g' T8 f$ M6 ]& j- i( g5 g# PIt burns down
# u8 K, J( P" lAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

3 L' j/ N: Z7 k0 ]9 x# f) k* u8 kEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
3 Y4 W' r7 h3 _1 g' ^' ?; R
, b- {: y# D- _$ Z# w6 d3 BThat is why
5 X4 Z; v) D8 ~When the stars are out they are visible
$ ]2 E2 \1 U1 g" mBut when the lights are out they are invisible
/ K1 v# p  j7 [) O5 PAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
" m- N' m# _8 aBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
" |1 I' h3 x8 T3 K& K" S% I1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

7 e2 u8 ]; b3 D3 Z9 B$ |; G
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
) }, ^3 |. T7 M( x7 c实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

免费杀毒软件下载酷我音乐盒wps金山毒霸2009下载免费金山毒霸~！!~！!！!！!

沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
9 F6 |6 f% V2 ^7 Q

  一民工大便不通去医院作检查，医生检查后给此人开了一个药方，民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸，不解，医生说：以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了！
+ ?, Z1 M  s7 }2 [5 Q
3 B3 A0 ?7 J# j: \8 o9 k& R
; Q9 F. {6 E. }- a/ l9 x) o% P-------------------------
7 P# o5 z0 _& Fa 传奇世界私服, b WoW Gold, c 传奇私服, d 传世私服, e wow gold