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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?7 @/ o. l8 p# u; Y( L0 n2 N
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Let's face it% f1 @- G, }1 y' c H! A
English is a stupid language.
* {, N% j. }. k8 z8 qThere is no egg in the eggplant
/ c4 g# J6 O% ^No ham in the hamburger
, c/ ~" k7 |2 H1 k6 k( b IAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.5 I3 }5 }. u4 h, h
English muffins were not invented in England* _3 _3 E' b* `+ y$ m' b, T. H( K: X
French fries were not invented in France.
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7 _1 @: U: V# S( e. s( H' oWe sometimes take English for granted/ p- L8 V9 S* K, A
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
/ r5 X' C( L) S( s: {3 \- _Quicksand takes you down slowly; a7 i& g- b4 H. c0 M2 \- c$ Q
Boxing rings are square5 y" E+ |1 K: k: @( j
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
" _9 D0 l+ y( a: y( ?* V1 d3 }8 vIf the plural of tooth is teeth8 d- j' ?% Z' |, s+ K" i- ]2 r/ z/ I
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
% U6 O2 M) h6 a- RIf the teacher taught,/ h& h$ C$ W E8 u( n) f# G
Why didn't the preacher praught.2 [) d# }8 D, m- K [; y
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables) r# |# u6 i. }8 J. t
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
/ J- K* A3 i8 r! d, uWhy do people recite at a play
- @$ A8 L& }: Z5 PYet play at a recital?
1 M. N1 K# M5 W9 F% c6 DPark on driveways and4 E* b, |8 ^6 k7 j
Drive on parkways% a p6 P. K- j$ g4 `# F8 i* @: d8 `
! q% l; S/ L7 t% a7 wYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
/ x7 t% ?! ~ t; K. f, VOf a language where a house can burn up as
1 v6 f2 F/ t4 `5 i" J2 kIt burns down# w; }* E6 z) R8 Y6 r# P
And in which you fill in a form
: a7 Z* T2 P' c$ kBy filling it out
1 A$ K! h4 m1 V2 v4 v9 oAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!% P: e; c, w6 l; K
9 b% U7 [+ ^* \* vEnglish was invented by people, not computers( K- W7 A, V9 c" k% `0 K
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
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8 V8 y: C! W6 r; F& @2 C2 f, d1 PThat is why
; d9 M0 j! \1 `/ f5 ?$ y" VWhen the stars are out they are visible! s* }* ~1 B0 k( ?- H
But when the lights are out they are invisible
5 E9 N) L1 z: x. l( O( V% Q2 |And why it is that when I wind up my watch+ x8 }* p# j) a
It starts
. W4 o% x2 e& g. TBut when I wind up this observation,, S: n2 L5 a9 T+ E7 j3 ?; [3 k; h
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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