 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident1 }% x0 V& A. _4 D! E
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck." C9 e% |8 I, B* }
0 a3 \/ q7 Y) z8 M! I
The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.9 P6 z$ I1 G0 J; O
/ M# P. k3 n9 A$ |" b
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
y2 j: V4 W7 k, e' b3 j; |, ?/ q/ \# }) f7 o5 f
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
7 F2 f5 [" P: }2 M) z" |7 W' J
& s( e% z2 q% L7 a. L; d2 FThe blonde started laughing.
9 m' r9 l3 W3 m& O, I
' W# N$ u4 q! [' W4 cThis made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.+ }, G `' T7 @8 e' u8 P4 t3 c. X, r
- A q& t. b6 a# q u6 O
This time the blonde laughed even harder.8 G8 ~" l+ S7 k% k) J5 o
9 z; [# h4 e3 b9 ^8 S: \2 n9 Y/ QLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.* `; _5 e% l* m7 [8 W
- q7 s/ K9 P9 `
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny." p' X; {% t3 m. f
6 X, }9 V3 d% a- v5 K* y0 HThe blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"; M; z+ y- I3 \7 [+ k; A/ P5 J( C
8 G! M8 p' _. b
Rowing Your Boat; f. a# P+ W) ?, \7 l: _ O# n
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.. h) J, q% {0 ^7 J; Q8 c N& n8 v
3 l% J6 B( `9 tThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
' o5 t+ S: L* r& X7 ?8 z" B; I8 x3 m# O% H, R
To this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her."
: j- p8 W- H S: G. p6 L1 d4 u; i9 t% K. |& t' B
I Want to Buy That' D6 u) }! u9 x+ m6 F
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.) d; Q# x9 |5 W8 ]# l8 w- c
" M' @ i1 |! n+ R I& [( U/ x4 A
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.6 I8 k5 W2 ?7 p4 L/ M
! A! ^5 L/ n/ A2 [* z C
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
5 {; @4 p( r1 |" _! |& T6 B/ H8 R4 `8 q
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.
! b7 j8 k0 G/ w) |( z' K8 |2 b
/ q R3 N- G& n9 dSure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.
9 \- K& ?2 _3 g r
2 x9 m r. V7 x2 n2 Q& S% C/ O1 _To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.6 t. D5 I8 @# B$ s
) w- E+ N( q% s
The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
3 b; q& k2 q. ~ a
4 V8 N& i' f fThe clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"5 k7 r r7 T2 @3 \) _& I# o
+ l9 U" Y' @& B; F; m+ Q, P3 e9 JAre You Really Sure?
$ n; p, v) _' Y& YA blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
/ E9 m2 p& r/ m7 w# z/ i2 ~7 q2 ?- Q D
In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something.") r" K* |) e/ x* S
9 O- O" @* z, W% j+ ^' g# Y1 u
Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"4 M8 X) N; [& m& S7 k
% A8 t" g+ p. i- r5 aThe blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."" F3 [/ j$ y0 L- Q3 q2 }
3 u' l3 @5 O b( ^0 O @" DBlonde Sky Divers2 }' B5 |. A% v
A blonde and a brunette are skydiving.2 ^; {, A; y% n
8 p; z4 R1 c, X6 i5 HThe brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.4 G( A% N- P9 s8 Q: N& Y
s- L4 H0 X: i. BShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.
3 b! o2 v N- c$ _! q X% ^ O, J! K7 A& i
The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"
- _( \$ k* o' G" n/ |7 \4 x8 b9 j
8 k+ U& ?0 n- Z( S1 c, |/ t" q[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|