 鲜花( 77)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
Blonde Car Accident8 h6 V* ]4 {. d7 g
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.* c% r" o3 b H6 w2 ^) j
; y( K: K* Z) }, t5 s/ I! K9 _+ PThe truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
+ O& e8 Q# ~9 V7 |6 o: j0 u6 A! }+ e: B4 v
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
0 g& W8 F) ] A; D# L% |
" v9 A/ i) j# S1 F; R7 QFurious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
3 \4 C, h6 L1 Z' ]5 M3 s+ v4 p/ b5 W+ Z% [
The blonde started laughing.! D1 p9 C+ `# `7 G% ?; K' n, u
" h& V. E9 q& n4 \+ u @
This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield. d! [! y! `% T, @5 Q8 [/ g
) e8 F1 U: j5 ~) q, y S% BThis time the blonde laughed even harder.
+ |4 i( W( f# G2 y5 I: I& K) H
4 t3 _) y0 z6 [7 e/ hLivid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.
: H$ G5 O8 s' F P' J* x) r; I+ G5 {* ]% j! h
The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.& D3 K3 G4 r# i Z5 V7 a3 _
# i4 o' [. Z8 C, \# H6 Q; q
The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"
5 T& O8 d, p6 X( s
; J" Z* h* e0 `; t( S) g' ^Rowing Your Boat8 d$ C2 [8 ^- D
Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field when they saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a row boat.+ {' ]0 s4 |; R C8 I
+ S! F2 H( n0 v; nThe driver blonde turned to her friend and said "You know - it's blondes like that that give us a bad name!"
8 F( _/ r3 n3 v! s% p
: W3 F. \ t7 Y! x+ e5 N) e2 RTo this, the other blonde replies "I know it, and if I knew how to swim, I'd go out there and drown her.". ?( x, _% r7 p( i% @$ k
7 m- {0 q3 i6 c# r/ z$ o- v' M
I Want to Buy That$ C8 z9 F+ a- m; V/ r! D8 n
A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
( l7 @% W8 D* l( A) c6 W7 R5 S! Z* [7 C. E9 |4 `
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.- b- A. J* T2 e' C4 z2 H/ o
. d# q }7 a, \! d( T
The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.
, ]3 z* u1 z8 [4 H* h4 u+ R, H4 Z$ Q/ R. x- p! {$ o) H
Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.1 c( q6 n/ [5 v, O! X# H7 i6 E
! i5 Z J- g I% B2 a, U/ ySure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.4 `% q' R' L& O/ g* f$ T
+ H* G" r! [& a' Z
To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.
/ Q9 O/ C. W4 A. s. s9 }( }! u; Z
+ E! @8 C0 |! T# h: `The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"
- Q( J* R2 e9 D8 o4 G, z8 O. l, N" q& G/ @, k: A
The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!"
" ^- a4 R. A% P4 ?% e4 O! o/ s; S3 j
Are You Really Sure?: q: T& t5 z* `: k2 w8 g( J
A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"
2 m# B7 ?1 L8 I; P4 Y
2 k* v& x- u D) v( X2 vIn a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."
/ Z- ]% t% ?$ G! c( t6 Y
. B, Z- d, z9 m7 x! pOur bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"
x& h$ K# L1 B% S+ b ]: }, ^& a! e5 t3 [2 z( w2 X/ X
The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."
5 W; E" {1 [) ?* F9 B. \6 Z: Q1 B0 b; h7 E4 ~, F0 x8 Z
Blonde Sky Divers
& g, n! P- M. U5 T: P4 H0 v( JA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.
8 _. L T! r0 `( M$ E) B
# H& l3 @/ l0 j {The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.
7 @/ ]1 U" v0 m( r1 f
" o5 b' L2 }: _! {% g7 qShe pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.$ O+ v0 R6 S' v
' R( Q: t, A8 L/ LThe blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"/ x* T( v0 v, w4 s9 U& v4 s
4 s! d0 b" Y! m; v- ~
[ 本帖最后由 Xbfeng 于 2008-10-7 13:31 编辑 ] |
|