 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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% S& Y3 m# L6 @- E+ wWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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% w; `+ L+ U3 ]9 L0 [, u& u3 cIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.* c6 W. s3 V+ n# @
4 \+ f8 N6 o+ gLook at your womanly physique in the mirror -- - {# G- F4 l4 Y3 s+ Y- g' Z
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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6 L! d# F2 L8 P" i& b/ w7 O- OWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.: ^% |% ]* ~1 V: F' n; W8 a
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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- G5 e8 j( Z3 J; ]6 `Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 2 \4 g6 p! G# a% m8 O- c
2 {3 C- S+ y% w% AWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.
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7 u, m9 S8 j, n" Y- `Turn off shower.& {* h, Q$ f; {6 N
" \! {5 q9 g+ ]% p' e2 R XSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. ) [0 j* q* u# Z1 A& P
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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+ R; s J1 [8 s& zWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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1 @8 N# @' ?6 t, a7 qReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. ) p6 ~9 ^! e8 \$ J; @
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. " S0 f0 |/ a$ U- z0 A) c; W' C/ Z
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: ; X- z( H1 q* S; z g" `0 W
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Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.. N5 L4 k: b- M! @; j% L
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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6 p# ?: p- w$ Y& Z1 ]Look at your manly physique in the mirror. ' {9 F( {4 q, l% C6 ~
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. # s% ?6 U+ I: ]$ V o
{( D3 a3 o/ g9 f" nGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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. g: g$ M5 M: `% @Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. # V( }% \, a9 F, x0 q' i$ b
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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4 {6 v% W" P' F# d+ CWash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. 9 i# M( J+ r2 @5 h% o
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Pee. $ p" c a, K) O; e7 \3 g
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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9 Y1 F! H3 M6 a+ I+ b6 KPartially dry off.. f/ Y. q2 s9 Z. w7 N0 c& U
# m* Q# Q3 e2 |) W$ t7 |# _0 P" uFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 7 `( U" C' m: q$ f' ?7 w3 r
( m- X6 E. E0 a2 D/ mAdmire wiener size in mirror again. 0 q) I/ Z1 {* [
- i; c. o* L6 k$ }Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed. : ~' U- i0 C/ r5 Q9 u( W
: J8 ]8 W2 f& C* f& P+ V# n7 ?If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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