 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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7 g% M7 g3 l: S/ T! U7 S* _Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
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2 ]6 ?2 B$ B3 f }1 HIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.( P, n6 Q5 m% S3 q f$ @, M
* h' c7 z0 w' P5 N: [+ DLook at your womanly physique in the mirror --
6 B) ]! Z/ h! F0 `0 W q/ W9 P( u$ |make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. : [* k4 ^# p5 A1 M8 [
8 M" ^4 _: h$ |9 j' O8 \! DWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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0 z: T* Y5 q3 o3 P: CWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. ' Z# v1 p7 y% U$ v# w- ^
; [; U0 w3 _( Z: p/ F) h: OWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
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5 Q; A3 [/ R( q s4 R8 ~4 j. V9 cRinse conditioner off hair.* o4 {3 N, g5 l; S# Z
$ o! R2 @) W2 @ g( k! EShave armpits and legs.+ o0 M0 N0 g+ J7 |& W. \% c
x# `' \; m) ~Turn off shower.5 i7 m" K. R; N* {7 B
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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. g- K% J. D$ u n3 K; d9 MWrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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. Y6 _. F( {+ T7 `4 }0 zReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. 0 E, \, I3 t' {4 j& I. f
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 5 E, k& u$ s9 O1 @
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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2 P& v+ M2 a% `7 O. }Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. + I) t0 u) l* C' _+ M: [! H8 G
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Walk naked to the bathroom.$ {( Z8 r/ L& m, A9 i0 r5 y/ @/ y
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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1 M; {$ s2 I2 X& r5 NLook at your manly physique in the mirror. - w; J! \2 y/ T7 v( _1 y) }, o+ ^
0 }/ d+ r7 n( K8 V* }" TAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 4 V. E/ R* U) t( R% G
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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6 x9 }! Y' C HBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. * D* p, ~8 d1 }1 ?' c
# K6 @* s) m% e+ p& L) jFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. / N; B/ E5 W0 g
0 A, I2 E# }! K$ Q" ?/ a9 TSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 9 e, m' T* r5 b( m
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. $ [9 @, K$ `8 Z; l( {
( j3 r o% H+ f+ x! W* sWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. $ E$ n5 a: o+ W6 N, p+ s( a
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Pee. 4 c: r. b6 }7 h. j3 B' }7 k) W& j
* i1 p7 ~- c6 d5 k, z3 J" CRinse off and get out of shower. ' U b2 h; o3 _% F
* N& E) }- G* Y3 z$ x( F( GPartially dry off.
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6 n h$ H% L$ H6 `1 y# w. V0 gFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. , y! ^1 B2 W4 B& _( y- Q4 K
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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0 D, x4 x6 z. f+ A' G7 nLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. / w* p @$ b" R* ~/ z# u
1 r2 k7 K& L2 kReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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Throw wet towel on bed.
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1 }/ C# g$ J" A$ }$ W( k8 VIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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显身卡
发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
