 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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9 L1 t4 ^" q1 S# f, eWhy did God make mothers?; C4 ?& W2 W1 |
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
" Y/ d4 [) \. x B2. Mostly to clean the house.
, E) _6 m3 Y5 T7 z+ |3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. , H; ]' E% u! C7 g, ~
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How did God make mothers?
9 ?8 O1 w& @! l" U3 E- H1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
# p9 Y) a4 h4 D2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
* ?; C' T; r+ |1 X3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? ) D6 k9 l, S. U0 t
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. % L2 Q# E) d7 \- C1 l
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
& s5 a- W8 w- S3 e0 ]/ F1. We're related.9 F$ y5 T4 ?0 s+ K" Y
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 4 L! j' H' E2 z4 N4 c8 I
- R+ P" y* Q% VWhat kind of little girl was your mom? , {/ b, f" N7 k I& Y1 I9 U' q0 m% X7 T
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
$ g4 Z8 z% ?* s$ S* P5 Q2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ! A3 {) L7 X$ b; _! J0 S
3. They say she used to be nice. ! S) A' J% l: L8 o* q; c
& T3 ~/ f. M; `, E7 W/ E' {7 X+ iWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
+ L; y% U C: N1 j; f1. His last name.2 N7 T: c8 X. R% s$ |! ?5 M0 N
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
# P3 a) q/ H/ k3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 5 Z, S8 r4 W! t4 _8 l' }
R, g0 B/ v2 h+ a/ N) m0 bWhy did your mom marry your dad?
" x8 P- y8 ?/ i! ` [2 p. X1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
% s" Z- c: X1 ?2 o" G9 F8 _. Y$ |7 V2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
. ?" U0 {' Z/ I7 n. L3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 5 ?! b; a7 p# O! ^& i3 B- b
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Who's the boss at your house?
$ F1 [% z" K1 \. n; z; b7 A$ @1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ! F* R) t8 V& l
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.5 b/ I0 h4 J1 i ~; G( J7 R
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ; E* o1 d q8 }# S- E( X, }+ u
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
4 F" q) ~9 ?: O' U' {# k; G7 _. U. O1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. ) y5 h; K3 y" s) n8 |6 N
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
$ R" I& p; C& Z x9 t3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
/ i' Q7 Z0 h( W2 E4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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) V+ Q0 M5 M$ }. K" y) cWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
) J! _8 U* }9 [3 p% c1. Mothers don't do spare time.
5 M) ^6 }. }( L4 k1 c2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. # w5 k4 m/ o% ?
* J, I. t$ H4 a9 tWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? ' }. q: u. Q/ |5 M
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.& s9 W/ j" ?& e6 T9 T+ g: P' A
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. ; q. ~( {- T! p$ p6 H
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 7 V+ L2 Y) ^. ], r! k6 ?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. * _/ X/ A3 A; I8 E* i" q3 V/ G
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
6 Y. a! t( U. F! x5 p3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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