 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?$ J9 j3 h* B# ?# v, ^9 I
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
' X; d+ J% Q+ D" `/ R2. Mostly to clean the house.
3 B2 V$ C: @9 T$ n' l [- E" _3 t n' G3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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; [# [% K0 G# H3 c oHow did God make mothers? ! ~% {7 g2 l6 }" _2 @% f. d5 O
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
, d& I0 g/ D V; m$ G4 Y! {9 N \2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
9 e4 ?+ ~5 l9 R' B, B# K3 a3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? 1 y( B5 J/ c" n2 h" L8 F, ^
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. & ~- D; ^& Y# U/ n
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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9 s: Q. X$ o; yWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
+ ^* M3 E6 D& v5 h+ P$ j) `1. We're related.
) U$ a" u7 h2 P. |% R! @- j2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
8 }( a( O3 b4 k# ?+ B1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 2 e6 |% e; X+ u9 d% e/ s% h% e
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
W1 u4 z. L" F+ G" m- @3. They say she used to be nice. 9 z! ?) k, ?2 h! o, @
. G' O: Y$ B! }. EWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
0 F! w4 h1 _" O7 E/ R4 \' Q1. His last name.
2 M2 V0 G: g; ~2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?2 o. r. x1 _: @6 i- ~ ]+ |
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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! y) h+ f) v, kWhy did your mom marry your dad?
' u9 \3 f* q0 y$ \1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. % _2 q: G5 V' T2 S2 ~. M
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. 6 Q3 P5 W7 L7 v7 Y9 [& b
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. & |0 @$ a# l+ P- a, @3 \; O: _
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Who's the boss at your house? $ H+ W! t7 y5 P1 Z6 F" S/ T. A8 B* M
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
& a% c8 q) C7 j" q( ~2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.1 M8 H- p' z( ~
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 8 ?. M0 h- J6 d7 j
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What's the difference between moms & dads? ( E; O5 q0 P/ D2 B$ f" [
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 7 }6 k1 }' P4 v) T7 U0 X0 k+ Z
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
9 R+ I% Z" }% Z, {3 H7 i. P: O3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. 2 U$ R8 e: J$ U+ x' v
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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! u( d$ n# R7 H+ C4 d0 M: rWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
2 o$ l0 r4 s$ E2 ?" q$ N1. Mothers don't do spare time.
$ M& I2 O0 n# A! l- v; ?2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
5 g' s, d6 i; | J* O1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.4 c" M. R: P4 a. l
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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7 m( C" e7 o! W" RIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
% c/ H5 l$ X) b2 y4 l1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
" y4 n* k' x N9 _2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.+ ^# A& ~- V- L# B1 m
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. # [ i" O& a/ D+ B2 Q" s
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