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# w( O' S5 {- h& @4 DWhy did God make mothers?0 E7 w. Y. M+ S' n4 S, |$ a8 E. i
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
6 v% [8 _0 u2 n2. Mostly to clean the house.
- P3 y) ~6 M" O3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. : x, ]; Q }! H+ \
! Y/ c; Y. A& l( kHow did God make mothers?
4 ~4 X# O) K/ t1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. C5 S2 r ]" `' F, x. o
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
2 X: W! O ?3 b- g- E, j* h3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. - s) y! M2 B9 b3 A2 j
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What ingredients are mothers made of ?
- u( B) z* h# c, @7 Z* H3 N1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. D! M7 D2 m* O. r& q
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. 4 u# _2 P, p `+ l9 E0 K s% c
. X! T& w# e' d- _6 PWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
& T0 f" F: J7 U& t1. We're related.+ b" C% K2 W: ~) H
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. , e, u: d. v6 y1 g
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What kind of little girl was your mom? . Z# |$ [/ Q+ b/ s: c: B; }$ W
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. - Z4 F) W- Q" G n" J5 i
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. # `6 @/ U; _- J$ O
3. They say she used to be nice.
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1 z4 p, L K) \' G9 T0 gWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
. Q+ K& r3 b& g1. His last name.
5 d/ W! T" C( k! t$ `2 }2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
) B( M0 `) q3 P) D; U3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 3 N* Y, ~1 e( B6 w6 K. }% O! ]
! q% U/ p$ F0 zWhy did your mom marry your dad?
# k" \% @' R2 |( E& p% G- Z1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. v2 a& [/ J, ?: _
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
, ]* G. g- _: U. m3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? ( e" p/ s; b% G' N3 b: ` `
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. ; u! e- z' U6 t7 I& l% [: R3 {1 x
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.; _- H& B- X' Z/ K
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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+ E4 m/ {, ~8 k, ^. A' `What's the difference between moms & dads? ) ~6 Q1 u' j @; m
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2 E1 v1 l) G; `2 @7 |( [2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
+ M) L: y% O5 J0 s* g3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
* m; @$ x' q6 O. U4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. ) S" @( g* x: q
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What does your mom do in her spare time?
8 E- \/ d6 Q& n e' K: `' u! ~) Q1. Mothers don't do spare time.4 `! i& A. ]& z p9 K* J! U
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. , Y) G4 L+ R/ f; n) Y+ E
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? " w" R/ W0 i/ a' ^2 S G/ N
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.6 H8 u- b% E4 c7 J9 z# H$ H
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 1 U2 C f# Y7 R. {* g3 Q
: J! Q1 x* l1 R' t: pIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 0 L8 I2 S7 I# y/ C/ k+ r
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
/ L$ Y: x3 ?) y! V' w( N2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
0 E! a6 |6 | V5 @1 e3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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