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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA: R l% z* E' X6 f
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. % V8 p$ _$ R5 R" A8 G+ E
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. % D) @6 Z. V" M% l3 ?
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. 8 _ ^0 v8 @0 V. U$ ~
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
& n9 H) K3 ` r t6 L! e# x! ~5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
5 w0 s: P- G M3 r$ O2. Ottawa who?
$ V$ H8 o- g( F" @6 G: j3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. # x/ j' K! I; T# y) x$ v
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
4 [% W7 h0 ]3 H! h |5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
& a4 h3 m- h: Z1 K$ p6 Q) r! I9 r) i6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. @* o& G: {$ [' `* v
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat. 9 x& L( L3 ^' a/ K/ q1 {
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
7 D' z' l+ A- s8 ^7 ^4 `: U" H3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. $ X: ]. q& s2 x o- D8 y2 `
4. People will assume you live on a farm. ( p6 u' E8 Z" G( Q0 @
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
* X; s; s7 V4 H% p: n B3 O2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. ' l) ]8 W5 |( S! w5 U8 `) I: n' F
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
6 _2 e6 S- ]' E3 K- {1 d- c3 |4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
4 a; D& p8 H0 d) | h8 |5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO ; s* Y8 l0 | i r2 o! i9 @% N; N9 _
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
5 V) S6 S5 j) a8 L" _# _" W+ H2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. ! A, k6 k8 E" H1 F
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. % R- _" j4 m8 f, k1 z3 Y% `
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC & C4 q5 z- B" t$ q# }, w
O6 w; \- }6 `) |- v4 u+ [, s1. Racism is socially acceptable N W/ j7 A: y1 A5 `7 T8 [& v+ D
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
- H8 [# `% T j" J5 K/ ]; z5 d3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
3 T* I& M2 o+ e; p5 @4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *, f! N3 W- A* R$ D- w) {3 d+ r& `
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK O: V3 k2 ]; G l
. w( ^! p' q: z9 nTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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7 F6 P( S2 \7 B! w# C6 d8 c1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
$ u5 d5 b7 w3 A7 Y/ X% y2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
9 o% n' q" P+ l j3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 1 ?; U1 ~8 M' J5 J. N/ O1 B
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. v/ Y# W. W9 Q
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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/ C; u! f3 n# }7 e& X1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
* H1 i- N! B4 y( s7 _1 w& I0 h2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
" |* g; \7 d7 j; S3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 9 _! n5 n/ t, k; K
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. 1 e4 u5 o8 _; K% H- I1 w
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
% J3 B- F7 k$ T2 s9 T; x3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. : T3 y; V2 C0 x3 A" e9 p5 y
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." 3 ^( C' G9 B( M( `/ }
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
3 H7 Z0 G: _6 L* j. h" e6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND + L) n8 H& J! p2 [# I9 J5 q
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
: E5 M& ^; K, ?: {0 {, f5 N2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. & _2 K: t4 S A) T3 C3 r6 y' u
3. The workday is about two hours long.
( ^3 I' e3 `: w3 {- T0 {, H4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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