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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA* z' L% G8 Z& K% Z/ U
) [$ S# E% C3 X1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
1 {1 e- I: i% c# Z! Q2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
/ ]. ?9 V, M" Q7 v0 Q; q3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. / d6 O2 M; c4 w$ k ?
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
. V9 v9 K( l7 A6 \! ^. G5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
3 h3 i) O9 d! e9 ?& F0 V4 |2. Ottawa who?
& P9 ]( ^5 Z9 x8 M8 P3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
& W' C- o# w& ~4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
$ p4 j- j; F Z. f7 q3 r; Q& w5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. 0 I0 L, Q1 F) h
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 8 p" v; Q) X1 m
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2 a. M) F; t+ [0 {7 sTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN 1 q h, r* K" Q2 R5 j- s
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1. You never run out of wheat. : k- D4 W: R& T$ S
2. Your province is really easy to draw. " P$ s$ ?- k0 ~; |& x! Z
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
( S, T* F9 ^5 Z1 m$ o$ h4. People will assume you live on a farm. ! ?% R8 y$ ]! E
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
: L3 b9 B% `' q- C& Y# g2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
, s; U; L D. l. K2 X. T2 `$ m" f% O% _3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. 8 x. q5 M: ^& M
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
7 ^* z3 j0 ^' K S4 R5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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* g/ [2 ]# S0 J- ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO & M' i. b( O7 i8 p9 j
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1. You live in the centre of the universe.
* A( D/ \1 n, Q; X( ?* t. j2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. ' N* |5 ]0 F+ G9 H
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
9 ^8 s3 |: y& I: F: A" t4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 8 Q O) S% c: J) D$ T. [' R
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% h3 g, k8 d# G2 r8 e! M3 ]" |+ S" TTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC 0 V) [6 y) I0 |4 P: V
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
$ e2 a) [# s# J0 l2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. , ~0 Z; ^2 T) j3 x& `
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. 6 X; l9 d! j+ U. ~
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *& m' P: J: m) P2 K3 C( H, L3 l
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 0 w& S$ q5 {# X% _! b
2 U) h; s: e$ n: e' Z. C0 E; b0 h3 WTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK . r. W+ }5 A9 e, O. u
3 n/ `" D0 f6 i3 u1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
* S% k% K) Y' F X3 q3 n2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. " @+ z e( m& ] E7 v( Q
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
6 F1 v- U3 I: R2 t1 M0 \- o. Q4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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- ?6 q9 Y4 b' `7 b9 I, J) |9 P+ V! K# g1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
& }9 p `! i! c5 ~% \: b9 C6 H2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. ( Y6 m4 p; t2 C+ m0 B# j
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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! x0 L6 B+ U) [6 |2 H. T1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge.
! c: d( M F. I7 I9 X3 i, o) Q+ @! ~; I( p: O2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ! N4 t; W; U/ i3 [6 X/ v
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. $ t m/ e9 k* w
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
% r4 m7 e7 c& r6 w5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
! d0 i: G1 K# O7 g0 A3 i3 ]6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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, T8 @. M8 o; E0 t# {; v1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
( ^! h. L/ o$ i5 b2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. - F! t- v4 ?6 y* k' [! Q8 ^8 R! ?
3. The workday is about two hours long. % ]" Y! y c* q* _
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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