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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA3 p( r/ s3 I+ G, Q8 T8 K' v: M
0 `( T) C3 h2 C) s/ L: l1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 2 u4 N: q9 A. H6 H l$ q
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown. ; j; s8 t/ a) B5 T
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
4 @& O3 M8 `$ [+ S! L7 i4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. * p" E/ \; t* _6 ?
5. Weed ! T# u, C& Q Z
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
/ b4 m- M9 o; e+ x' m( b G) d- B2. Ottawa who?
; [9 p. A( {# i9 }5 m$ N$ k+ s. X3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
! f: \# A% }9 Z1 T( F4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. " D* g9 J S" C4 b
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. ' a0 n a, i. N: `
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 9 i" u8 t3 J' m' I9 V$ _+ E
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- N4 N$ h0 \% s7 rTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN
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1. You never run out of wheat. 0 M; O% D1 l6 [2 A
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
2 y1 \8 D7 J; f$ i5 C K3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours. + i4 b1 t) C% e: ]3 _
4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 8 @. b( I- |# I
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1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
/ i% j" J5 T! H2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
! w5 ?5 U% V5 a. s4 j) Q; |3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
( E* Z6 R' U5 a( r+ i6 L: D% Q) h5 ] u4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
; B& }# ~$ i/ f8 w% H; z5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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; y: a$ H" r1 t" A1. You live in the centre of the universe.
# a5 E1 ] a0 |1 V! E! r2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
% a( P! n5 E$ s+ L3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. * x9 s, v, v6 \8 r3 ]& H0 U$ N
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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. L! w1 F$ p7 m2 a; g2 i. a2 g1. Racism is socially acceptable
4 g) y `( u2 W0 ^& n K+ N2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
+ S Y3 u, M6 }* u7 O. J6 D. k3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
& n9 l' I( E: k) j( R# Z( p: l9 v/ t4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
$ U; o" W4 E% N$ I0 zTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ) E* L4 `, r+ w
8 i: W0 I( ?, U+ wTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. # |, W7 d; c! n
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. - j+ s6 y1 y% M- @: {
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick ) a1 I% n' Q5 z2 c- W
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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5 ?- E8 C7 ^) x9 P. I1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
9 ^" ~! c* F. b3 {" U2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
$ l) }$ _6 s) S4 Y" n4 B3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. / Q9 _4 _$ t/ r) S
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( K) {& x. A5 Q/ o/ ~; Q4 e) QTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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4 Q4 [9 ~+ t% V5 \6 T" G) z3 ~: _& r/ T1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. 7 q6 D" @8 I" Y& S& t L
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
; `8 p; E. z* L5 e3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. ( q r- M0 f% b( o; o
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
! v6 G" H* P1 w! m( O5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. . X* n/ |; D4 B q. k' ^
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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# V; N( K' r0 G. D# A: T6 ]! PTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. $ n# i' s2 U0 D I- ^- }
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. . ~4 M% n G& g& c! `# P
3. The workday is about two hours long. ' T* e7 [* y6 y% q* f; O9 o
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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